Is it ok (or creepy) for guys to talk to women in the gym? | One Good Question

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I always thought, was it like
Love Island? Uh, whatever those shows

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are. Colleg was just watching.
Was the MTV one Rental Control Parental Control?

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That show is crazy? All those
dating shows, there's something so interesting

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about them that all the streamers always
do, like blind dates or different dating

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shows. I always thought, like
a super fitness one would be really interesting,

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I joked, but I told Barty
could do it with me if you

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want, yeah, or like bro, it would bring It's not been done

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before. That's what I literally told
bart. I was like, Bro,

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like just bring in, like yeah, like muscle mommies and whatever interview style

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you want, blindfolded or behind a
thing or like you they rate they they

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want to date me based on my
deadlift or whatever stupid ship you come up

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with. Yeah, we do a
dating show. Mike's like, okay,

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I'll do it. Fine ship hot
muscle mommies and me. All right,

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dude, I'll volunteer. How many
of them are not gonna know who you

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are? None? If they're if
they're like under the age of thirty,

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probably none. Okay. I mean
even in our era, right, like

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chicks were into this, but there's
make Squats is like the only chick YouTuber.

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Like now there's girl YouTubers and influencers
everywhere. Back then, there's like

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two can't swing a dead Cat.
It was like Nicky Blacketer and and and

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and squad Age. She's after age. Range could go pretty wide too,

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like you do, like the New
super Into, like the fine typical bullshit

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that oh yeah, I don't even
listen and they don't care. She's just

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name it chicks. But she's new
too, but she is. They're like

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that middle class. They're like twenty
sixteen, okay, yeah, like in

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our era, there's none. There's
a lot of people that don't. I

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mean, you could have people that
are ye, twenty years old just getting

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into fitness. I'm like dating,
No, not for you. The Dating

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Show. I was like, that's
a stretch cas for his own head right

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now, dude. But you have
them, and then you have next season

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people that are like even i BB
pros that are over over forty, the

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Silver Fox, Muscle Mommy. Essentially
it's just a sixty five year old.

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Usually it's the Man by seven Fox
right Yeah yeah, yeah, well you'd

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be in it too. He'd be
looking for love. Yeah, that's what

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I'm saying. He's been dedicated to
the gym for forty years. Now it's

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time to dedicate to a woman.
Yeah, that's the you need to learn,

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and then he can get some pointers. Maybe at that point, like

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you need to stop what you're doing
and sell the sixty five year old pick

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me. And so that's what he
is before the If he was born fifty

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or forty years thirty years later,
he'd have the tripod and the Oh he'd

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be Guzman. Yeah, he'd be
in the corner by himself flexing. Yeah,

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but he came. He was too
into the gym too early, and

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now he's a loser. He should
do it though, that's a good idea,

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right, Yeah, we'll be the
first contestant. Yeah, he was

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doing it before it was cool.
No, dude, you'd kill it'd be

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fun. Or the button gave the
cut on the Budget game with Avy just

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you know, you literally could just
with fitness people. What is the button

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game? Button game is like you
have like a blind day. You just

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sit two people down and then you
can ask questions or they send in prompts

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sometimes I think, and you ask
a question and as soon as there's a

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ringer like a buzz, the first
person that yeah, the first person to

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hit it stays and dumps the other
one and then if don't want to date

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them, and then if no one
touches it, they end up continuing the

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day they take a second date.
OK, so you sit there, yeah,

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guy clips everywhere a guy comes up, and then like you'll talk for

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a second and then the button will
go red and like you can either hit

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it, they can hit it,
or you both just sit there if you

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both like each other all want to
continue. Let's bring this into a question

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for the Friday episode to wrap her
up dating. The old golden rule is

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don't talk to chicks in the gym, right. That's the old golden rule,

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which I think is actually stupid,
right in the sense that if you're

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now gym culture is different. The
type of gym you go to matters,

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right, Obviously, the type of
person you're going to approach matters and what

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they're doing and their energy. And
I'm not saying just go approach every woman

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in a gym, but if you're
about this lifestyle twenties or thirties or forties

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doesn't really matter, but especially in
your twenties, thirties, even thirty five,

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let me know, Yeah, well
get a day, a little younger,

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if you're ms are open eighty one
if you especially for pictures. Yeah

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only if you're hot, good credit
score, household homeowners only a dog,

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that's a bonus, yes, please. You are expected to just go to

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a bar to meet someone. Yeah, right, so if you're trying to

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if you're really about this lifestyle,
you probably don't go to that many bars

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if any Like, where are you
supposed to meet someone? You know?

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We have couples in here in the
gym that have either met here or or

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definitely have brought their significant other here
and workout, Like it seems so normal

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to try to meet someone like minded
out a like minded place. It's like,

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you know what I mean? I
agree, I percent. And whenever

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I hear that like the whole don't
approach don't talk to girls in the gym,

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I've always been like, ah,
like, there's there's nothing wrong with

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it. It depends on how you
approach them. And that applies to anywhere,

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grocery store, whatever, a bar. You can't like honey, like,

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that's not gonna work either. Be
respectful, kind, start like,

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don't be awkward, don't be Yeah, it's just like do it in a

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nice way become friends with them first
and then so they get to know them

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more. Everything you named is way
more difficult to do than for a lot

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of guys, and they're scared shitless. And there is a process. There's

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a process right to dating. There's
a process to approaching someone. There's a

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process on evaluating when's a good time
to say hi to someone that's guy,

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girl or the other. Like it
doesn't really matter, not even dating wise

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either though, like just to make
a friend, though, there's a time

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and place to say what's up.
All those things come before, Like don't

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approach them in a gym, and
that goes for both ways, right,

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because some girls do that forgot to
guys gyms, right, but I think

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the gym's like the best, like
especially and it depends on where you live,

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right, Like we're all California people, and like the cities and stuff's

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a little different. But like I'm
not gonna go talk to a girl at

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the gas station. She's gonna mace
me, you know what I mean?

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She reason in college, it's it's
it was college because like college gym all

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college students or college class, the
cafeteria, like you're made to talk to

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people yeah, but at the at
the gym too, it's like you'll see,

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I mean any gym usually you'll see
the same people over and over again,

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and then you'll be like, oh, this person's consistent. They have

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a similar lifestyle. The gym is
clearly a priority for game with me,

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right, But then like it says
a lot about like discipline or motivation or

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lifestyle choices that are very similar in
a line, and they're more like they

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they clearly prioritize their health. And
then you check their resume head over,

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head over to Instagram. You see
what they're really about. That's your resume,

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that's your dating profile, and then
you search that a little bit.

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Essentially, the pool of people that, like, all my friends that I

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met was mostly through if not like
classes, it was mostly through the gym.

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And it makes sense people, Yeah, I met most of my friends,

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and then when I talked to right, it's like through the gym,

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which is kind of sad, But
no, I don't think it's sad at

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all, because what's the opposite like
made about a house and then you have

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nothing in common besides you love to
chug beer, Like you have nothing in

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common beside you love to just go
to callege together. Yeah yeah, yeah,

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yeah, like go Waggy's majority of
the time I'm spending like how many

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hours in the gym a week?
You know, Like, yeah, it's

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much more like class. I think
it's not crazy, particularly since I understand

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that LinkedIn is becoming kind of a
dating size. You're right, thanks for

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telling me. Guys, obviously none
of you care about me, it is

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though, right, Yeah, I
need to go I need to go in

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there and update my profile a couple. You should mirror picks. You should

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find a little lawyer mommy exactly,
any lawyer muscle mommies or surgeons or some

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ship do the lawyer muscle. You're
talking about a percent of a percent of

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that's that's what I deserve. No, there is a there is a someone

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in the parliament community who is a
lawyer and known like for being a lawyer

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in parlifter. Yeah it's like,
yeah, I forgot where her handle is

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a lifting lawyer, Yeah, something
like that. She's followed us for a

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long long time. Yeah, she's
all she's she's buried in his kids now,

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but you know she was single one
and she started following. I'm just

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saying there is a niche out there
for you. Thank you. Yes,

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insanely wealthy, empathetic, great glutes, good credit, and what do you

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have to bring to the take squeeze
me, friendly eyes. I have all

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that plus some oh great glutes.
I have good glutes. Well, I

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think I mean something that that Kyle
was saying here, though, I think

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that there's too many people period,
guys more, but people period who don't

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know how to have a conversation with
somebody that they don't know. Number one

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and number two. I think that
they put too much on it. They

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make the steaks too high. I
think the sticks are not that highly or

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you don't do it enough. It's
just like anything else if you don't do

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it right. If you build up
this chick for a year and you never

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talk to any other woman, and
then you go talk to this chick,

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Yeah, your heart's gonna bring Let's
just say this. No one's that cool.

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Just do it, like welcome to
Abby's dating class. But I think

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they're so afraid, not necessarily of
rejection. I'm sure like guys that like

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everyone's been rejected, right, but
like well, I'm sure like they they

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don't want to be seen as like
the creep and they also know that person's

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trains around the same time. There's
a lot going on now they're like,

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damn, I could ruin the social
dynamic with everyone else in the gym and

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this and that. But also another
side note, women have no game,

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but true true tweet tweet. They're
horrible tweet. Their game is hey,

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yeah, that's it. Yeah girl, any girl that's me is kind of

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like that, hey, bunch of
Why if I give a hay out there

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we get a response? Forty,
I said Jessica Biela. Hey, I

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never got an answer. Yeah,
No, I don't get it. I

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mean I do get it because they're
usually approach first and they never have to

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do the game. Guys are like, this is like this is life for

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death. I have to spread my
seed. Yeah, life or death.

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Your saying guys are good at No, guys are good either. They should

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be. They have to be.
They have to they have to be,

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they should be. That's the only
way they're getting even a conversation right where

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the girl doesn't have to be.
Girls have way more to choose from.

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You have to understand, like,
girls have way more options. Guys.

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We can count on one hat.
Now, how many times we've been hit

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on? Is that true? Kyle? Yeah? That Kyle's like why,

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I mean the bus with you,
but like how many times a girl would

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straight go up to you is way
less than au And like if that doesn't

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happen, like I'll have like because
I know a girl at a bar or

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whatever, and like we kind of
know each other whatever, then like they'll

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follow me and then they'll DM me
and be like, oh, I was

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afraid to come talk to you.
That's usually like what girls do. Girls

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are like they won't contact you first, or they won't come up to you,

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and like it's rare. That's why
whenever you hear a woman that does

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that, it's like a guy will
tell a story about it or something like

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that it's an exception, yeah,
Or the stories girls talk about are the

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ones where guys do it in a
very nice way or very respectable way.

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Sure, and then they still rejected
them, and they still like, oh

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he was nice, So what what
can a guy say didn't look like it's

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not creepy. It's usually just in
context, and it's not just backspots,

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no spot your warm up? You're
like, what that's offensive? They Oh,

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do you mean a spot you have
like one yeah I've read and be

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like get out here, brok.
The best way I can go about it

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is like make it completely not about
them approaching you at all. They could

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come of like let's say you're like
squatting or something like that. They could

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bring up anything like are these the
TSSs we're gonna use for the right?

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Yeah, you gotta break the ice. I say something to ask them stupid

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question you already know the answer to, or help them load a plate and

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then walk away after have you seen
the sky as the blue lately? Yeah?

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You load the plate and just sprints
away and really stupid. Hey,

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fat penguin? What fat penguin?
What did you call me? Fat penguin?

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What? What is fat penguin?
Just something to break the ice?

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Oh that's good. See dad joked
like she's got a laptop on his left.

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Is funny, am funny. He's
probably got an Excel sheet of all

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the boys and all the options checked
out. I was gonna say, like,

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I don't know if we could you
know, such an expectation for the

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kind of comedy that you're gonna get
from that person for sure, Like we

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can I don't I mean, we
can cut this out or whatever. But

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I think it's fine. I think
it's not a rip. It's fine.

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But I was gonna ask Abby,
like, has there been a lot of

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members or like prospects out of like
DMB. Not a lot, but I

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mean, like, is it like, Okay, she's a little intimidating.

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I am scary. I'm a scary
person. People don't approach me. It's

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probably your height. Yeah, that's
the times. And have you done the

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opposite? Have you, like DM
like a guy hitting on a guy,

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or approach in person? I start
conversations, I have gotten person in person,

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I will do what I just said. Right, it's just like like

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a question or a conversation in passing, just like saying something or like hey

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like your shirt. You're probably the
last generation though, but below Abby,

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we're fucked. I think it's they're
they're they're they're where they learned was in

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COVID. Oh yeah, I think
about being sixteen in COVID. Yeah.

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Now you're twenty and you're at a
bar, and you're twenty one at a

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bar and you're supposed to talk to
a chick. You're fucked. You're fuck.

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Yeah, that's probably true. There's
social isolation. What's your success rate

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of like getting them to continue talking
to you and like see that they have

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interest in you. I don't know
how to like you say, it's more

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so than not or fifty fifty you
got you got, you got nine white

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lights up line sixty forty seventy thirty. I don't know, eighty twenty,

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it's probably eighty twenty. Yeah,
okay, yeah, I don't know.

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In the gym, can you approach
a woman and say, hey, I

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really admire your you know, the
commitment that you have to to sculpting those

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pieces to be in good shape,
or like you're a good technical lifter from

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what I can and see it,
I really appreciate seeing. Don't be so

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professional about it. I got another
one. Hey, is your boyfriend gonna

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spot you? Or should I spotch
you? Like I don't got a boyfriend

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I don't need in that case,
Actually a professional fun very obviously not work

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at all. That it wouldn't work. Some things are like, oh,

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they're obviously hitting on me. Things
are like oh, maybe they just do

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want to know, like where I
got my lifters from? You like the

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mystery man? Or are you running
somebody's program? That's yeah, do you

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a coach or something you have a
coach? Yeah? Anything really anything like

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not relating to dating looks or anything
like that. I think I think that's

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like a no go off the bat
always you never talk about looks because then

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like their intentions, I mean,
I feel like it's not slimy, like

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if their intentions are like man,
I really like this girl, I want

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to talk to her, and like
they downplay themselves, like to not show

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that obviously, like that's the way
they gotta do it, Like they have

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to do it that way. I
mean, if they come out the gate

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hot, you're like, oh,
like all right kind of yeah, seem

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a little desperate. Also, that
was too hot, like yeah, you

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don't even know me, right,
test the waters kind of thing. Guys

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don't have that issue. If a
girl comes up, they're like, oh,

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what's up? Yeah, yeah,
okay, yeah, I got here's

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my numbers. You want to get
married? Alright? Literally, Like it's

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like that, it's crazy. That's
what's scary about it. For for a

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girl's sake, It's like if we
just want to be nice and just like

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sort of conversation. Yeah, you
can't talk to a new person in the

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gym if I like, I hope
someone move, I'm like, I just

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don't want hopefully don't take the wrong
way because I'm being nice, right Yeah,

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yeah, but that it's hard.
Yeah, but you got to do

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it anyway because you work here.
Yeah, and they still don't unpersonally because

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I'm scary. I'm a five f't
scary person. I think I just have

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a It's also just the confidence too, Like I'm confident in the person that

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I am, so it makes it
easier to approach people that I want to

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or like I don't know, the
other way around, or people don't want

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to approach me unless they have the
confidence to do so. I don't know,

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Aura, Aura Energy Spirit. Do
you want to be approached and find

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the love of your life in the
gym? Oh? I mean, now

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you're making a very spific like the
forty nine ers, because like that's where

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it seems like the gym has been
off limits for a long time. The

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initial statement was like it's always been
like, ah, do not. I

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don't know if that's real or the
internet, because I'm sure if you ask

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a lot of couples who're like,
yeah, we did meet it the gym,

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you know what the internet makes it
like a thing. Right. It's

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funny because like you see that online
and girls like, yeah, don't talk

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to me because they're like, like, I know I'm hot or whatever.

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Right, but if their dream dude
came up and spotted them with the dumbest

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line ever, they'd be stoked.
And girls have gym crushes too, And

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when I hear them say that,
I'm like, well, I don't think

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it's that weird. Does that make
me a hoe? You know, like,

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am I easy? Because I'm like, I don't care if you talk

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to me in the gym. Just
don't be weird, anti, don't be

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awkward, don't be don't don't say
anything uncomfortable for the both of us.

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Let's be friends first, see if
we can have any chemistry. So hard

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for people to do that, for
sure, Even like even if it's them

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meeting a like a new friend that's
a guy, there's still like, oh,

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I don't want to seem weird to
like this new friend I made in

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the gym, you know. Yeah, yeah, they're still thinking that way

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too, So yeah, making friends
just like guy friends. Yeah, And

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then you get so confident that you're
just like, oh, yeah, do

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you want to work in whatever,
or you give up on girls altogether tho.

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Yeah, yeah, yeah, then
you used to start an online dating

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show and to find love. Yes, ask your best friend to start online

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dating show for you where you are
the what is it called a bachelor?

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Yeah, fitness bachelor. What would
you call it? The show? I

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don't know this. It'll always come
off corny, you know, that's the

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best part. Like Love Island sounds
pretty corny, But a lot of a

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lot of fitness folks actually ended up
on there because they justcrib really hot Instagram

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people. I think, like Rob
Lip said, was on there show my

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boy Rob Rob was on there for
an episode or two. Do you go

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on there? I don't maybe,
but i'd probably be like Rob. Rob

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is probably the nicest human I've ever
met in my life. And I think

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he got booted off the show in
like one episode because they all do gossip

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and drama and like, you're fucking
her and I'm fucking her and we hate

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each other and they have fake fights
and Rob's just so nice. I think

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you got like voted off in an
episode. Yeah. He made everybody feel

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uncomfortable about themselves. Yeah. Yeah, And he's a very good looking man.

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Good looking. He's just like a
normal guy, Like you're too normal

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00:18:06.440 --> 00:18:08.960
for this. Yeah yeah, but
I think other people too in the fitness

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space were on that show. He
was in the UK one. But looking

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forward to seeing you start your show, I think so, who knows if

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it will happen, it should what
kind of dates would it be? Just

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like straight like that's what, Yeah, you gotta find up. Yeah,

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you gotta find the like one little
gimmick. I think it'd be like a

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good one to do, like uh, like to close off a section of

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00:18:26.720 --> 00:18:30.799
barbaro bagate or something like that.
Ye, Like you guys do a workout

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together and like see how Yeah she
puts me through a workout. Yeah,

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00:18:33.759 --> 00:18:37.240
and then I rate her and then
you rate the workout. You missed the

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00:18:37.279 --> 00:18:41.160
hamstring? Yeah, yeah, that's
why you're quad dominant bitch. He gets

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super stiti. She's like, all
right, the date, this is a

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00:18:44.000 --> 00:18:48.119
horrible workout. You're a glueless that'd
be fun, all right? So Abby,

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00:18:48.240 --> 00:18:49.480
dms are open. Also say hello
to her at the gym. She

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loves being spotted and loaded. Coles
are also open. Mine are not open,

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00:18:56.000 --> 00:19:00.319
totally open. I open them for
you. What she got Abby ram

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00:19:00.319 --> 00:19:03.359
at a dot lo and maybe taking
clients. Maybe not inquire, and she'll

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00:19:03.599 --> 00:19:08.079
inquire if you're a good athlete.
She got you're a good am at Sebastian

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00:19:08.559 --> 00:19:12.279
Big Guy the dating Guru Instagram.
I don't know what I'm doing. I

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00:19:12.319 --> 00:19:18.359
don't date at all ever, Kyle
dot Castro definitely listen to this. Ladies

318
00:19:18.359 --> 00:19:21.000
and gentlemen, New episode Wednesday and
Friday. Thank you so much to be

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00:19:21.039 --> 00:19:23.079
dot CEO for all your apparel needs. Come by their stree barbell and talk

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00:19:23.079 --> 00:19:26.880
coming out California. We'll go.
I'll catch in the next one. I

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00:19:26.920 --> 00:19:29.839
am Matt J. Mcdee and all
the social media that shows fifty percent Facts

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00:19:29.880 --> 00:19:32.839
for percent is the word and the
fifty is just numbers. Fifty percent the

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00:19:32.880 --> 00:19:34.960
Facts is a speaker, Prime podcast
and association with like our media on the

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00:19:34.960 --> 00:19:37.960
obscirs, so the network and we'll
talking next time.