Are you a douchebag? Take the quiz with us

0:11 You know, Um, I think I have an epiphany. Oh, let's hear it. I am a bit of a hater, of course, but I think I'm fairly justified in it where I do think for myself, right, Like you'd rather not have people just fall the crowd, like yes, man, yeah kind of thing. So, like everyone loves Connor McGregor, right, They're like, oh, he's so great, he's so cool. Yeah, but like that's why people like him, right, And they're like, oh, dude, he brings so much the sport and he's an international. And not that I don't respect what he did for MMA in combat sports, but I was never a fan. I was never not necessarily a fan of his shit talk. I just don't think it was that creative, especially when you compare it to someone like Muhammad Ali or some people that are a little better on the mic, or someone who's like awkwardly funny, like a Mike Tyson interview. But um, they just came out with a new documentary on him, like a docu series. His docum series mean that it's real, it's supposed to be a document series. Is just supposed to be a documentary as a TV series, all right, Because instead of a movie, yeah, instead of like a you know, then what is it when they do it, like, um, it's the story of someone's life, like a bios documenta docudrama, right, because I will always say docu series meaning it's a series of documentaries like Planet Earth, right, but some people use it the other way, and I didn't know if I was wrong or I know you're right. So they did Connor McGregor docu series, which we should probably do a full episode on. But um, I started digging into that, and it does always like open my eyes and some of it could be

1:44 the filmmaking, but it always makes me kind of question my dislike because you understand kind of where he's coming from. I think so, and like like certain interviews that weren't as famous or things he said to the documentary like make me relate, yeah, because you kind of see the flashy, like the entertaining, the unhinged version of him. Yeah, those are the things that, like the clips I get thrown around the most are talked about. But that's what other people like, right right right? Yeah? So but then like just have weird taste. I guess, well, you what is it? Like, it's more relatable so you see him as more like, oh, he's more similar to me than I thought. Yeah, the big Yeah, the big one was he said. I think it was in one of the big interviews. But also on the side, like when he's at his house or he was doing something in Ireland. I think he was doing a like a kid's class for MMA and Ireland or something, and one of the moms asked him something, you know, like like can we see like who's the true McGregor, you know, like what do you do? Who is this? Who are we dealing with right now? And he's like, oh, basics. He basically just said that he's so mirrors and is like felt the energy in the room. So he's about to fight a douchebag. He turns into a douchebag if he's in a room full of kids trying to get better, he's like a dad. So he's a chameleon. That's how I feel. That's how I feel often like cameras on and I'm next to like Bard or even you guys like energies high, I'm gonna say some crazy shit.

3:10 I'm some fun energy is low. I can be the serious guy. Yeah that at home, I'm kind of like back in the day, that was called having a versatile personality, where you're now it's called I don't know. Well. I mean, here's the thing. I think that a lot of people who are charismatic and potentially douchebags have ye that that quality. I've turned myself that many times where I have douchebag qualities. But I don't think I'm a douchebag because that I can like relate. Actually, let me let me let me tell you. Oh is that funny? Wait? Hold on, hold on, let me get my list out. Yeah, I think I can. I think I can. It's like pages and pages long.

3:53 I think I'm a chameleon. I mean that's good that you're supposed to be. Right. I don't use it for evil, like a karma chameleon. But yeah, but I don't use it for evil, where douchebags will use it for evil, like to be manipulative to get women. We don't get women, get zero women not So, So what you're saying is that you're a really transparent douchebag. Yeah, I'm a douchebag with no douche just a bag or no bag, no bag either. I guess the bag right, because you go home with the bag one. Okay, So because we're a rudderless today, I'm gonna throw this in here, um, like on a boat. Yeah, you can't move. Yeah, right, So this is supposed to be, um, a quiz of whether you're whether or not you're a giant douchebag. I took a side note. I took a B DSM or something test live on twitch once. It was fucking really detailed. Wait a minute, wall and discipline, masochistic yeah or whatever, like what's your kink or something? Oh? Really Wow, it was like a swear to god. It was like an hour. It was like an sat do co.

5:01 Covid was a bitch man. We had a lot of streaming hours. So streaming sixty hours a week, you got to find content. We call that edging. Now, yeah, it was long. It was long. What so what did you find out from that test? So they said it was vanilla or something? I mean, because I didn't want to like, you know, Baschel one's head against the wall or put spandex on my ass or something. You know, if you're not like into it, you're not into sort of that world. Mister boring or switch switch I think was that which you're not. Like, I don't need to like get whipped and I don't need to do this some whipping. No, I think that means you're you're willing to do either. Yeah, yeah, that's what I means. Yeah, like I'm a role player. He just doesn't have to. You know what a role player is. A role player in basketball is like the guy that will fill in the gaps. He'll do he'll do what needs to get done. I'm for the team, I see. Yeah, and that's what I and uh, I don't know. I think they call it utility player. And yeah, baseball, okay, so basically somebody who can play more than one position. Yeah yeah, you can kind of play first base and can kind of play out field. Yeah. Basketball, you could rebound if they need to rebound. Yeah, I'm filling it in. We got boxes. Uh, okay, so we want to take the dish bag, quizz I think Ivy should take it, right. I think I'm a pretty let's see, we'll see. Okay, So, uh, you cancel plans you had with a friend. Whose responsibility is it to make new plans?

6:23 Okay? No, ones, plans will happen when they happen. Mine, I'm the one had to cancel plans. I should be the one to make the new ones or theirs they wanted to hang out in the first friend friend friend I think is different than dating friend. No one's responsibility dating on me? Mmm, I think it's me both. I would tend to agree with you. Yeah, I just don't feel like as obligated to be structured with a real friend if it's a real friend. Yeah, and I don't need apparently don't have any real friends. Yeah, you know what I mean? Or or even like if it was a girlfriend versus dating a girlfriend, it shouldn't be this like, well I did that for you, you better do this for me, you know, like I don't. I don't have that type of relationship. Yeah. But in dating, because you're feeling each other out, then you got to show your interest and so you have to put an extra effort. But but you're you're showing who you aren't, not who you are. No, if you do that, no, because then I'm showing Oh yes, I do actually want to hang out with you. I just actually couldn't canceled. Yeah, I'm not actually just ghosting you. Or if you're my true friend or my girlfriend, you already know I'm not ditching you. Yeah, or you should by that time. You just know that I'm actually busy, or they know you're abe, or I want to be alone in my room. Okay, so I'm just gonna say, well, what we'll go buy abby. We'll do that. Actually, but I feel like you're more gonna be more douche than me. That's fuck. Well, which one are we doing? Show of hands? Uh? Wait, there are three of us. I think we should do mikes, right, we

7:54 can do me okay, no ones? Yeah, I think it's no one in a friendship situation that because you're going to eventually hang out again. Yeah. Yeah, more like if it's if it's the homies, something will come up. What happened to me? Like? You know I expected to be able to touch the Oh no I did? Okay? All right? Um slept weird on my shoulder? Holy count you're an old Abbey. Yeah, I feel that I want to talk to me about it. Yeah, he's at How close do you stand to the person in front of you when you're in line? I do hate creepers, so right behind them whatever gets you're closer to the front, about three feet away, about ten feet away. One of these answers is completely stupid, one of these answers is creepy, and one of them is right. Yeah, I say even three feets like give or take, but yeah, the obvious one. Yeah. Two.

8:46 It depends on the line, right, most people in America, the distance that you want to be from somebody is least an armed lank. Yeah, that's just cultural norm. Yeah. I think it depends right, because you're you're hopping on a tram in an airport, all right, it might get a little close. You're in t SA, Mike, a little close, but if you're in line for an ice cream cone, like, give me a fucking breather. Yeah you know what I mean. Yeah, that's pandemic shit, that's hyperbole. I don't know. And then yeah, I'll up in your growth. But a lot of people do that. Yeah, I'll be looking around at a grocery store. I'm like, too, what are you doing? So? God name close? Yeah, I don't know. It does creep me out when people get closer. I I have like weird peripheral vision where I can sort of almost kind of seat behind me. Yeah, you feel and so if I can see something back there, you know, creeps me out. I gotta move. I got either. I'll do it. I'll step to the side, I'll go, I'll go horizontal.

9:37 Mm. So you could see if the talk you because they tack you. Yeah, you gotta be ready, thanks, Yeah, I get it. Always ready, stay ready, stay sharp. Um. Okay, So you I think this is a this is a situation where you have roommates or you have people in that you live within. Now do you douche bags stand close to people? Said douchebag thing? I think it's a creeper thing. Yeah, I can't. I can't really draw the line between a creeper and a douchebag though. Honestly, that's why I hate about these. Some of these tests were actually the uh what's the I n F j abcd YMCA myers breaks is pretty good because you don't you kind of know where it's going, but you don't really know where it's going. Yeah, where some of these if I wanted to answer it and prove I'm a douchebag, I could do it.

10:24 Or if I want to answer it and prove I'm not a douchebag, I could do it. Yeah, the answers are clear. Yeah, it's it's BuzzFeed, give me a break. Yeah, all right, um BuzzFeed to hire a new psychologist. Um okay. So if you if you go to the bathroom and you see that they're just an empty toilet paper roll and there's no toilet paper, do you replace it immediately because you wouldn't wish that hell on anyone. Leave it be I bought the last roll. Not my responsibility, or do nothing and spend the rest of the day brooding in silent contempt for your roommate. I'll normally half ascet and probably to chuck one on top. Maybe I won't feel the whole ring. You know. If I'm in a hurry, even at home, I will do that. Yeah, Like I'm in a hurry. It's like I don't want to screw you, but I also don't have time to do this. If it's the common area bathroom, yeah yeah, I'll do that. Yeah, Like, because it's not fully my responsibility, but I don't want anyone to have, you know, poopy butt walking around. Oh my god, you guys know it actually uses that. It just shows a difference between dudes and girls. God, check it on top in my house. Uh, it's kind of a weird flex. I guess we each have our own bathroom plus like the common room area. Yeah, flex on a babby. We're living life with lust out here, so I don't really come across this issue often. It's very rarely, but I do check the common area. Not that we have guests over really, but I do check the common area and make sure it's not totally gross. So yeah, I mean, we we have two bathrooms in my house, and um, here's the deal. I shower in the front bathroom because that's the one that ask the the on demand heater or water heater,

11:58 so it's like, I can you can take yeah, and when you can take a shower at first fucking long as you want. The one in the back has a separate, smaller heater, and you it's hard to get all the way through a decent shower without getting cold. Yeah, but that bathroom has the bidet toilet seat, so you're shitting one shower and the other. That's pretty much that's an issue too, from two different Russians for two different purposes. That's weird weird flex. And then the third bathroom for brushing teeth yep, and the golden forth for washing your hands if if only you go outside and use the host wash your hands. Yeah, I'm definitely replacing it, throwing away the old one in the trash, and you crush it so you flatten it so that the tube isn't just taking up extra space in the trash can like your water bottles and your and your soda cans. You could throw the tube at your dog and a committed a dog toy. Your dog's eating that and then pooping it out. You probably should just tearing it up and leaving it everywhere. It's just paper. Yeah, that's just not you don't even have a dog, first of um. Yeah, crush your toilet paper rolls, Crush your water bottles and your energy, crush your partner soul.

13:07 Okay, what best describes the way you ride in an an escalator? I move to the right if I'm going to stand, and to the left if I'm going to walk fair or I stand wherever I want. It's an escalator. No where furrowed right now. I'm that's common practice. But usually if you're on an escalator, like if you're standing on the left, I'm running your ass over like I'm in the NFL. Is it even wide enough to have someone passed on sometimes maybe I'm just that big. I can tell you that this is a big deal in all the London underground stations because the escalators are like like this, they're like you know, Mount Kilimanjaro, and uh, you're on them for a long time. They're really really long, and so yeah, you stand to the right. I think there are signs that say that stand to the right. Yeah, I think all that's common.

14:01 It's freeway shit. If walking on the road shit, it's bike riding shit on a path. Yeah, if you're on allow that all that. If you're if you're cruising, get to the right if you're not. Or the man movers, Yeah, we have a lot of man movers and airports and ship like the horizontal deals. Yeah, yeah, do that. I guess woman movers, I'm sorry, ivy or people people movers moving side thing movers, I say, moving sidewalk, that's me. Yeah, that's fair. Yeah, move to the right. I think there's very few escalators that you're gonna be trucking up the left. But what if it is an emergency or you gotta go get you know, Yeah, and you want to have to keep saying excuse me, excuse me, excuse me, excuse me. Even though I wasn't just in where was I I don't know, I've been everywhere, but I was in one of the little tunnels to the airplane, right, the little boarding thing. The lines are fucking packed and pilot and everybody's stomping on our right, like on our right, on your right.

14:50 Why are you moving on my right to get to the airplane, like obviously they gotta go set up. It was a stewardess' like a pilot. I'm like, that's just so weird flight attenda. Yeah, one was a pilot too. I guess there's no like left and right and outer space or in the sky. That's sky. To me, that's weird behavior that's advert there. But both Yeah, twice happened. I was like, this is all that's that's that's really Yeah. However, it depends on where you are because um other countries, I think, like the UK, when you're walking down the sidewalk, you actually sort of go to the opposite side of what we do in America. Yeah, because the roads right, probably yeah, probably cars. When you walk you face cars. When you ride a bike, you ride with cars. What I'm talking about sidewalks on the sidewalk, right, yeah, probably the same right, I don't know. I don't know if you could face the cars but also be on the left side or the right side of the side. Yeah, So if you face the cars, do you think the fast lane is towards the cars? I don't know.

15:50 Well, that's what it would be here, right, yeah, or you would be yeah, and walking sidewalk, you would walk on the right. Everybody would walk on the right, so of the path or of the are Uh no, I'm talking about sidewalk. Sidewalk everybody who's walking, regardless of the direction, and they're going or walking on their right, Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah, except that other countries do it the other way and it's very confusing. Yeah, and then people are inconsistent it's the same one stairs people are in. Then there's a traffic jam. People are so many people. Other people don't even know the basic rules here too, or people are like biking against traffic, Like I almost hit another bicyclist the other day. I'm like, dude, what are you fucking doing? Like, and we have a lot of one way roads here. You should teach them a lesson by hitting them side I should have trucked his ass, because like, not only do we have one way roads, so it's kind of a duh, and then two like, yeah, why are you biking the opposite direction in a bike lane? That's a really good question. I literally almost trucked one. But walking, yeah, walk against traffic, bike with traffic.

16:47 And we have some protected bike lanes here. Yeah, they're decent. I have seen them in other cities and I thought they were great, and I don't think they look great here There there could be better, yeah there, it's because the parking is suddenly really hard. How amazing. Wouldn't off the off like level two bike lane b whoa, it can't be that hard to build elevated downtown, wouldn't see sun anymore, like all the trees because it would just be like a thin ass lane through the trees. People are probably dying on there. I don't know. I have guardrails, right, that would be really cool. That'd be genius. I think that'd be amazing. It would make it so pedestrian friendly. Another city above us, Yeah, well, it's like the highline And that's what made me think of it when I used to walk that up in Manhattan. Yeah, there's an old train track in Manhattan or subway or whatever he used to be. Yeah, it's the elevated train ye way, and they turn it into like a mile or two walk with like plants and like food vendors and like street vendors and you just do this really cool walk above the regular road. Yeah, and it just makes sense. And it's not super functional now. It does take you from like South Manhattan too, like the middle, but it's not like Mega.

17:56 Yeah, and it's a little bit broken up to yeah, because but in theory makes a lot of sense. Or like Chicago has trains like that, right, Yeah, they have elevated trains, and he has New York used to routinely have avail. It just makes so much sense to that pedestrian ship there, Yeah, just to me, and just as an aside about pedestrians and crossing streets and things like that. Like, uh, I think it was in London, but it may have been in Paris, I don't remember. Um. Instead of having like here, we have these totally lame things where you can push the button and it flashes, but it's not a regular intersection. It's supposed to be like a pedestrian crossing thing, But nobody who's driving really pays attention to that because it's not bold enough. These places had like extra stripes on the on the side, I mean on the crosswalk, and then had posts on either side that had there were like barber pole things, you know, like black and white whatever, and then they had lights on top of them, and the lights flashed all the time. Why not just at that point just drop the fucking train deal, right? Yeah, well, yeah, that's a fair point. I was walking by one the other day because the light roul went down and then like it was going back up, and I was talking to Daniel. I was like, imagine I just hung out into it. That'd be scary. That'd be scary.

19:15 Speaking in light rail. Um My, buddy Kenny, his mom was driving his car down here where she doesn't normally drive and either hit or got hit by a light rail train. She was in the car, totaled the car damage the train. She was okay, did she had to pay for the light rool? That's a good question. He said. It was all with his insurance company because it was his car that she was driving. It depends on who's fault, I guess. Yeah. Um, when you use Uh, when do you use the turn signals on your car? When you need to? So that's when when there's a line of cars in front or behind you. Not too often people can tell where I'm headed or pretty much all the time. I have that of doing it all the time because that's how I was taught. I do all the time. Yeah, I don't even look who's behind me. I mean I do so I don't crash, but I don't pay attention. I'm always yeah thing or sometimes if you're on like the freeway and there's like no one a really around, do you still use it? I do. I think it's just habit. Sometimes I don't, and I feel like, oh no, I'm not using it, you know.

20:14 I kind of way too. I kind of wish i'd give tickets for ship like that instead. I bet we would have less accidents if it became more common probably. So how would you catch that though? Yeah, it's just random, right. How they catch anything you would have to be very difficult. Yeah, they just sort of decriminalize, you know what they call it, California stop the rolling stop decriminalized. Yeah, it's just a it's a cheap ticket. Now they morstly don't write them like I've only had two tickets, one speeding and one of them. That's the beauty of writing on bicycle. Dude, I fucking don't stop for shit. I'm a little scared just because I don't trust people. I don't either, yeah at all ever, But you feel a little maneuverable on it, you know, more than a car and tai Yeah like that Queen Latifa and taxi why quote air quote that was her? Maybe there's no way, um, Okay, you're sick on a workday, do you go in? Absolutely, I've got work to do. No way, I can't risk coughing all over the place. And or three. I might go in for a little, but if it gets too bad, I'm out of there. It does depend on how sick I am. But I hate getting people sick, and I hate that notion of that. I hate people going to the gym when they're sick, Like, don't get me sick. Like everyone's like, well, we'll affect my gains.

21:27 Fuck your gains. What about everybody else in the gym? All everybody's about to go to, Like, don't go to the fucking grocery store, like fucking especially now like door dash hit yeah, don't be a douche. I hate that. See I'm not a Jews. So you're gonna say no way, Yeah, probably no way. I mean yeah, unless I know it's not contagious for whatever reason. Yeah, but especially in this era. I get it. In the eighties and nineties, right, you have deadlines and should now everything you ninety nine percent of shit you can figure out on your laptop. Yeah, COVID change things in a lot of ways, that being one of them. It's possible to do almost everything that doesn't require a face to face. And I hate it because then people are sick forever. Like I get sick, but and I get fucking flopped. But I'm sick for like two days and then I'm rocking where people will like push themselves.

22:14 And then now you're sick for like three weeks and the pneumonia. Yeah, Like I wonder why you're sick for someone because you're half working. Like just I literally shut down. I lay down in bed. I don't leave bed. I'm chugging liquids. I'm sleeping as much as I can, and I try to beat it for me and for everyone's from me. Yeah, I agree. Yeah, See, not a douchebag. Only Mike can answer this question. Here we go, as you enter a public restroom to use the urinal, there's a row of urinals, and one is taken. Where do you stand? You? You always go one space for sure, right? You always give him at least one breather. So I was listening to David Chank's podcast on the way in and he one of his co hosts, was in a restaurant and um walked into the bathroom. There's a row of them, I think he said there were the three, four or five of them.

23:08 Whatever he did. The move when everything is empty is you go to the far one if it's no one's in there or no one's in there, Yeah, I'll go far or the close. Yeah, whichever one is not the little kid one. I'll go to the little one. I will go to the little one too if I have to. Yeah. I don't know if that's like that wendicap parking. I don't know what the law is on that, Like is it just reserved for short folks or kids? But I'll take the little one. I'll admit to that one. Yeah, I will take just the closest. I would take the little one as well, if it means I avoid being right next to somebody, that for sure I'll do. Yeah. But even if it's a full thing like airports, sometimes for some reason, I have a billion stalls and sometimes they're totally empty or BUCkies, like you know, there's just a hundred stalls and for some reason, not everyone's pissing at the same time. What hello, that's a bus pussy.

24:06 What does that even mean? That's what a bussy is? What's a bus pussy? I don't know. If there's car pussies, there's people that like, like car sex shit over here. Um, yeah, I admit, I admit publicly I've used the small pisser. Okay, okay, So what happened to him is that he's like he obviously never take the middle regardless, he never take them. That's kind of psycho movements. So he's over to the side and suddenly there's someone next to him peeing even though there were oh there open one. Now I think that's common. Yeah, I don't know why people do that because they want company? Yeah. Is it like the puppy pound or the dog pound or like you see one puppy and then all the puppies lay on each other. Um, you know that's a thing like puppies naturally want to lay on each all right, right, Yeah, So I wonder if there's something in humans that are like well, I don't know, but wait till you hear who it was, Mike Hayson. Oh, then I wouldn't be so mad. I'd say, what's up? Champt never talk in the urinal either, that's fucking weird. I don't like that.

25:08 But if it's Mike Tyson, I'm saying what's up. Mike Tyson says how's it going? Yeah, and he responded to him in exactly what you said, Yeah, how's it going? Champion? Yeah, I would say that's yeah, that's fuck. Though, I'll say, hey, I'm the great, great at Eva. Nobody like me. Yeah, give him. I'd give him the speech of a decade. Nobody but Pitheth like you. I love Mike Tyson. I want to say, like his most famous quote, but it will get canceled, he said to him. Not nice thing. Yeah, let's not get canceled. Uh, although that seems to work out for some people. Yeah. For some reason, I don't like boxing.

25:51 I've never really watched it. Mike Tyson and Muhammad Ali have like studied their lives and training and documentaries my whole life, just because like the training parts, they're kind of testing as people than they are as boxers. Yea, and they were champions. I just don't love boxing, but but both of them are. Yeah, the sport itself is whatever, but like they as individuals. Tyson's another one, like he literally was just like a bad person. I think he'd admit that and he just changed. Yeah. So, uh, the question is do you stand as far away as you possibly can? Do you saddle up next to him and it's time for some good old fashioned urinal conversation? Yeah, it's weird, and or I wait for them to finish silently waiting. Yeah, yeah, I don't go as far, but I definitely give him at least one stall reach. So so I think he's for this for that for as far and like, yeah, if the if the urinals are clogged up, you go to a um, you go to a stall. Yeah, yeah, you can piss him a stall.

26:45 Yeah, I'm not mad, It's okay. You think that's weird, No, I think Peane's sitting down is a little weird. I just don't have to worry about any of that. Okay, So say there's four stalls and you're going next stall, or you're gonna give i'm a breather on the stalks. I'm gonna do. I'm gonna I'm gonna give a breather on the on the pooping tin. Yeah yeah, yeah, you give a breather. You don't want to go right next. When they hear the door closed, you're looking at each other's feet. It's weird. Yeah, I mean, it's not that big of a deal, and it's easier to like manage. I think I'm trying to think. You know, everyone gets a little poop shy. Yeah, there's not really any of the those type of politics in the women's restroom. Yeah, I bet you there are, just like maybe if it's dirty, it's like, come on, ladies, like we can be better than we can better. Yeah. Um, you're opening a bag of chips in a crowded, quiet place. What's your method? You slowly opened the bag, trying under make much noise. I love that as as fast as you can, like ripping off a bandage, one and done, or save the chips for a less, less awkward room. I think I'm trying the pull apart horizontally, so because yeah, and if you can't get the probably I'm probably waiting. I'm probably gonna wait for another room. Like who's eating chips? You're disgusting. Who's eating chips in a quiet room?

28:07 Yeah? Like, what are you going to open chips in a library? I'll probably wait. I love the awkward, like you could hear the crinkle, you could tell so funny. Even in an airplane, I feel awkward. Yeah I don't. I don't want to be the person to do it, but I will laugh at it for sure. I think I bought because because obviously elevation and ship and so, Like I bought cheese, it's in an airport. I've probably done this one hundred thousand times, Like about cheese, it's and then they're all puffed up and it makes it harder to open. I'm even awkward an airplane, and airplanes not like known as a quiet place. Necessarily people are dickheads in there, even though it should be. I feel like library etiquette should be a thing in an airplane. This is why, even though there is no technological problem with people using cell phones on planes as long as they can connect or whatever, is that most of us don't want people having phone conversations in that close approact city. Yeah, that's a whole other topic. How many people like talk so loudly and normally on phones, Like I want my ship private. I don't like even if it's not a private conversation. I don't understand the people who walk around with their phone on speaker. But even that, bluetooth shots still a thing. Yeah, it's so weird because I can't tell if you're talking to me, are you on the fucking phone or you just singing music? Why are you in public? Or you're mentally challenged? And it's odd. Okay, elevator doors open, it's full of people. What do you do? Stand in front of the elevator to make shirt that you get on, push your way to the front, making sure point a minute, okay, stand in front of

29:37 the elevator to make sure you get I get on, push my way to the front, making sure I'm I get on this elevator. That's the same thing twice or side to step to the side and let those already inside off before getting on. Yeah, clearly the last one. Yeah, it's the last one. That's you know, they say that like all the trains almost on a million trains in Europe, and that's what you're supposed to do, just wait for people to get up. People don't do that. That's why the tram at least, the tram and sack at least has one door open for people to leave, and then it delays the other door because then it's for people to get out. Yea. Yeah, yeah, but I think that's smart. I'll go against traffic there too. You can sneak out. When is it okay to use the high beams on your car when the dark road when you're the only person on the road. Yeah, yeah, whenever if we weren't supposed to use them at will, when we wouldn't have those, it's technically illegal, right or I don't know. I always forget to turn them off, Yeah, definitely the first it's Yeah, I think that's it's kind of the Blinker deal, like FID needs to do better yea.

30:33 And even even like why you're doing it in a city? Your city should be lit enough, like if I'll on some back road shit or yeah yeah, looking for an address. This should be like a you know, the grocery card test. What's the grocery cart test? If you don't put it away. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, this is just common courtesy test. Yeah, that one was in here and I skipped it because yeah, that was a no brainer. You go to a party with friend A, you into friend B who has never met friend A. What do you do? Yo, this is my buddy Sally. Easy. I always do that. Immediately introduced, Yeah, yeah, I always do that. Or maybe it's like a quick catch up, Yo, what's happened in an aby? Yeah, good to see you. Oh yeah, by the way, m Yeah, I mean I don't know what some people are about. Some people are bad at it, and they'll just stand there awkwardly until like I got to introduce myself, like, oh hey, I'm Mike by the way.

31:26 Oh yeah, you know, it should be an easy intro. Yo, this is Jenny. So this the next question that the um it's no longer available, the picture is no longer available. I guess it was probably a text. So can you respond to a text saying just k K is never okay? What it says? Uh, yeah, it's fine and it's a legitimate restop respond stop being so sensitive or are you serious? Why have you even read this far? Click the first one if you're not an asshole. I think it's so context to it because K can be very passive aggressive, it can, but if it's just given you a salute like got your message?

32:06 Yeah? Why why do people use KK other than the key pressing? I use KK? I think my wife uses y KK because Sam used KK. I think it came from UM. I think it came she knows the code, dude, it's Kirby. I think it came from when text was the one through nine. Yeah, key pressing, and you'd have to double press it to get it to go because K wouldn't be a thing. Oh okay, you know what I mean? And that's okay. Do you know what I'm talking about? Yeah, when I was a demon on a BlackBerry, and that's how you had to type because it was all the one through nine. So it was predictive. But it was also called something else, not the quarity whatever. I don't know what it was called. It was a different type of keyboard obviously, where each number gets three letters. Yeah, and so you have to do predictive and so I think to get OK across or KK across, you'd have to do He's a quirity to talk like in reference to the keyboard. Yeah, what is it called. Yeah, that's a standard keyboards acquirity. I didn't know that. I mean, I know QWR till. Yeah. I think it's called quity. Yeah a yeah, so the opposite of whatever cority was. But yeah, the BlackBerry Pearl, it's the one two three. I actually liked it because you could text fat just as fast one handed, because one it was a smaller phone.

33:24 And then yeah, with the predictive text, it was pretty good. You got good enough. Yeah, you'd have to double text. That's why I like texting now was like a little facetiming. Shit. I think I grew up. I think my very I think it's even smaller than millennials. I think it's just around my pocket. Was the text thing because AOL Messenger was huge and texting was like just becoming a thing. So I grew up in a text bubble where people in front of me do phone calls, and then people even two years behind me, probably like Dan in them like FaceTime, where Facetime's like kind of new and awkward to me and and and just me as a person, I don't like talking on the FaceTime is very uh intimate in a lot of way. Yeah, that's what I think. I like FaceTime. Yeah, you're the new GENI generational I have no friends for one and then two. Yeah. I like the one hand text. I swear to god, I would do no look text. I could do a whole sentence like this, I can't do I love that. On the old one, I can't do it now. On the old one, I would fucking dominate that. I scream at the touchscreen keyboard all the time. I constantly fuck up. I really hard up too. I really wish um up.

34:34 Yeah. I wish that the the BlackBerry keyboard had survived. But it did it couldn't. Yeah. Well there's a movie about it called BlackBerry. Yeah. BlackBerry is good about the introduction of them. I know they didn't want to go touch screen and they thought their ship would last. I've seen stories. Yeah. So, although I think they are coming out with a new touch screen phone right now, oh BlackBerry. Yeah, and there. I don't remember who they're doing it with because they're not doing the actual hardware. I'm sure it's yea many yeah yeah, um so the result of this not an asshole at all. Nice. There's another one. There's like, you know, like there's a main road and then there's a road on the right for like merging. When lanes merge, I feel like the common thing is to um alternate right, yeah, yeah, its crowded. Yeah, but then some people are douchebags and well yeah, I'm like, there's clearly a system here. Even in person. People try to do that when like lines will merge at a concert or like a basketball game. We're standing line, right, we went to the playoff game. There's hell of people. Yeah, you just always go one one, like it's not a huge deal.

35:35 But some people try to sneak into a group and like, yeah, I'm like, dude, you're you're you're that rude. That one thirty second weight is gonna make it. Yeah, that's gonna make a priority. Yeah, that's where I lose I hope for human kind. So um, we can bring this background just sort of our you know what our vertical is. Uh, what what are some douchebag jim It's got them all go good gym things. If there's a large chalk bowl, even a medium chalk bowl, crumpling crumpling chalk actually isn't that much of a pet peeve. And I know a lot of gym owners hate that. If there's a block, don't crumple it. I don't hate that as much because even the remnants are usable. Yeah, but do your hands in the chalk bowl. You're not like Ron James.

36:23 You don't play for the Lakers. There's been chalk on the floor and it's hard to vacuum. It's impossible to get it up. Yeah, so it's like, bro, and what do you What do you as a lifter get from that? You get nothing. It doesn't look that cool. You're literally just making a mess to make a mask. That's like eating your cereal and having the bowl on the table and not bending over and pulling the spoon to your face. You're just losing shit, You're not winning anything there. Yeah, you're just gonna spill milk and cereal. So obviously you eat your cereal either the bowl to your face or your face to the bowl. I just don't think they think about other people when they're doing that. For sure, people they're not considered ring that. Oh when I'm vacuum around the gym, I'm like back in my head, like I'm hoping they see that.

37:05 I Like, we clean this gym so that they would probably maybe keep in the back of their minds when they're training to beat the top pick up their little rappers. Yeah, or like they're you know, get rid of your cans um. Yeah, that's a huge one. To talk in the bucket whatever. Another one, and this is pretty powerlef thing, a bodybuilding niche Like it's cool and normal. I think now to carry your gym bag station to station with you, but don't like move in, so like, don't pull everything out and take over ten feet when we're already in a crowded gym. Yeah, like like if you need a dig in to get your lacrosse ball because you're fucking adductor shirt, you pussy put everything back. Yeah, you're at dissy, I said at dis j Yeah, yeah, put everything back in. So go dig your shit out and then put it back in, and then move your bag. Cansolidate. Yeah, push your bag man spread, push your bag closest to the all, closest to your bench or closest to the location you're using. Your bag doesn't need to be way over there, you know. Like, let's let's again, Yeah, you're self absorbed. There's a lot of self absorbed people in the world. Let's not do that, Yeah, especially as a gym is getting more crowded. Yeah, and I'm guilty of it sometimes, but like, but yeah, consolidate as much as much as you can. I make a trash pile of my belt and my sleeves and they're kind of together. Yeah, Or like you have your bag and stuff because you're next to you. You train on a rack or maybe a machine, and then you leave it there so no one knows if someone's about to use that, so they avoid it. Yeah, it's a ship ship play. But it's like you're you're done using it.

38:35 You just you've been gone for thirty minutes. Yeah, if you're doing cardio, now bring your bullshit to your cardio y. Put it against thinks you're occupying. Yeah, against the walls. Just always a safe play, yeah, you know, because then you're not Yeah, you're not claiming space, you're not claiming an equipment. Yeah, And I don't think people are always doing it maliciously. Same with the dirty chalk shit, but it comes off very self absorbed. Yeah, using baby powder inside the gym, yeah, ye the other day, or or when people say outside, don't do it right outside of a door, literally outside of a door, So everyone who walks in real tracking. The point of doing baby chalk or baby powder excuse me, outside is that it's slippery on the ground. It's gonna get underneath people's feet and then on a barbel or slip. So if we're gonna do it outside, let's go to a corner or around an area where no one walks, no foot traffic. Yeah, that's the point. That's one hundred percent. The point of that is now your feet are slippery and it's chalking baby powder on the gym. Chalk in general, I thinks misunderstood. So chalk in general is not sticky, right, so we think about, oh, chalk helps your grip well kind of, but chalk helps any like water absorption. So yeah, if you're sweaty it's hot out, you have clammy hands. I have very clammy hands. A little bit of chalk on your hands can help that. If you have too much chalk on your hands or too much chalk on the barbel. Barbells are designed very well, although it's kind of you know, old or ancient looking technology. They have little mountain grooves in there to dig into our skin. So if there's too much chalk

40:06 on our skin or too much chalk on the barbell. Now, those grooves are gonna get filled with chalk and the barbell won't be able to dig into our skin and be able to lift. We call that grooves. We call that nurling. Yeah, so if the nurling is full, and same goes with your T shirt. Slamming a bunch of chalk on your back unless your back is sopping wet, which can happen in the summer or certain gyms, A little bit may help, but chances are the barbell is not going to slip on liquid on your shirt. It only slips on your hands. So like chalking the living fuck out of a bench does nothing, Chalking the living fun out of your shoulders does very minimal unless certain instances, and then even over chalking your hands does literally nothing but make shit dirty and probably make you feel primal and cool. Yeah. How's that? That's a really good That was a very detailed explanation. Thanks because it is true. Yeah, if you're if you're soaping wet and it does happen right it gets hot summer, a little chalk on your back it may help, but you can just literally pat it or take some of those remnants and have a homie, uh you know, pat it on your on your bar path on the or the bar placement. But but just chalking, the living fuck never chok a barbell.

41:17 That's a waste of time space. Ie you how many times I saw that, especially in the in the geared era. The chalk, the chalk the back of your squat suite, chalk, the barbell Chalk's like, oh my god, how's it gonna hold on a little bit of chalk on your back when you're real sweaty, a little bit of chalk on your hands. But but it doesn't have to be that often, especially you motherfuckers that probably don't even work hard enough to sweat, right, Yeah, yeah, like I do. I got clamy ass hands. I don't. You got dry ass hand? Yeah? I feel like the liquid chalk stuff, if applied like very um sparingly on your hands, it is even better. Yeah chalk, because with block chalk, I actually put for liquid cho over a block.

42:00 Um, you do this enough and you're like you clap enough where you do like touch enough things before you're set and it's off. Yeah. True liquid talk kind of like it's more controllable and then it doesn't really like flake off the way that it's cleaner and it's small, sticky. I don't know how much actual chalk isn't it, but I know that they're just like handed perspirant. Yeah, there's like alcohol to you that. Yeah, take shit away, Yeah, to get it to dry. Um. What I think the keyboard you were looking for earlier was T nine? Yeah, T nine. I'm a T nine demon. What's T stand for? Text? Text nine? The nine numbers? Yeah, yeah, text nine. Yeah, I was a T nine demon, A little predictive text on that thing. And I'm spiting in other words, you're old. That's how that, That's how like text slang started though. Yeah, that in Twitter because back in the day we had no overhand just yeah, we had no characters, so you had to do you and steady you people do for everything now. Yeah, yeah, the letter you, steady you. The L O L. I mean that invented l O fucking L. You can we meet me? Me and my gen invented l O fucking L. Dude? What have you?

43:08 What is your gen given to the world? What have you? Guys? TikTok dances you can um yea riz riz yat. You can do bom bomb. Oh nothing, Okay, I ever see if I can find this lady parts Okay, that's the nice way to say lady parts and like caribbean. Um, yeah, you get like text whole sentences and just acronyms or like short sure like w y D T mr, lm K. What are you doing tomorrow? Would you say? Let me know? Yeah, that's beautiful. Yeah you like that. Yeah, dude, we invented that. I love that. There're some get a little crazy. There's even some new ones.

43:53 I didn't even know once know a y C E oh all you can eat? Yeah, I didn't know that for a long time. When was the ACE? I didn't know that was like I didn't either. I didn't either. There's a new ACE place I'm trying to go to. Yeah, what is it? Carean barbecue? Let's go. Yeah it's easy. We don't we eat like right now, one protein bar, one energy drink for the day, and then freaking early dinner. Yeah that's how I eat kind of protein. Yeah, how good was my case? Cerrito deal? I sent you, oh not your cheese locale tortilla and beef ground beef, and I fucking I made one yesterday that looked it looked like it, right, the one it looked pretty good. Then as long as you get cheese where you ripping the tortilla and then you cook that part first, it'll like weld the tortilla. Yeah, that's good. It was good. And if you want to get after you, what's what's in those things? Let us sour cream? You could all do those healthy tomatoes and then they do a hard shelly. I didn't do all that. Yeah, but the hard show does add in a nice texture. Crunt trap. Yeah, I made a crunt trap. I made a healthy crunt trap. Nice. Yeah, it was good. Did you make it for TikTok or something? No, I should have. That's why you wasted the opportunity. But they're so good because I sent you one. Right, they're so good. The food content creators are gangster like. They're good chefs. Yeah, and they're like presentation and their editing is good. I ain't got time for all that. No, it's a lot. You cannot compete, No, for sure not. Yeah,

45:27 and let's see that's gonna watch me cook and like do one hundred takes. We can do it. Well. That's how Mike and I started working together you know show. Yeah that too, what yeah what yeah? Yeah, they made an old cookie show. Those took forever time. I mean, I like, you can cook, Um, I can cook. He can cook. Yeah, I can cook. I'm not like a chef. Jim you can cook, Jim you. Um. I used to cook all the time. And then, um, I used to make dinner all the time. And then when my wife was working during the day, and uh, then she started having a lot of gastric reflux and so didn't want to eat past, you know, a certain time of day, and so there was no point in me making a full dinners a full dinner. So we changed how we eat. And now she's retired and she cooks all the time, and I don't think and yeah, I love to cook. Yeah we cook me. Uh. Into training Partners Robot and Cove. Robot and Cove, they're humans. Yeah on my channel back on my channel from twenty thirteen, thirteen, twenty thirteen, Yes, ten years ago. Oh my god, I was like a freshman in high school or something somewhere. You can go watch him bro eats. Yeah it's a good name too. It could have ran. Yeah, it could work. It's just timing and yeah, I mean it was the problem is for me, it was a lot of work, so really a lot of work to edit. Yeah, we shot it,

46:58 shot it. We kind of shot it like new age shit. Yeah, cuts overview view. That's something that would like to do. Yeah we can. Yeah, we talked about doing a food channel. I know, it's just there's we can we can lock it in now that I'll travel less because yeah, we talked about doing it eating one and a cooking when we could do both. Yeah, start a cooking episode of eating. Uh taking a pause from from cooking eating and Jim etiquette. Um, you were talking about you. You mentioned riz earlier and not everybody has known what that meant and I do now. Um, but a Stanford student, Brian HP Chang created riz GPT, a monocle you wear that displays chat GPT output to tell you what to say in case you get tongue tied on a date. He calls it c AA S or charisma as us. You know who I literally think invented RIZ. Who guy? Yeah, I think he literally meanted that.

47:54 Well that's pretty cool. Yeah, it's crazy, that's right. I saw a clip of him. I think it was like, Um, I don't think it's in the real dictionary yet, but it's in like, you know, the slang dictionary or whatever. It's called urban diction. How does urban dictionary get through in this PC world? That doesn't seem right. I don't know. That's a good question. I haven't answer. Everything's getting canceled. Urban dictionary is just cool urban urban. Yeah. Actually we have Oriental dictionary dot com. Like that can't fly. Yeah right, I think you're just it's like the name of the game. If you're on there, you kind of know, like yeah, I guess. But there was like an English professor at some college going over his class with urban dictionary shit, and they brought up like a bunch of stuff this streamer either made up or popularized.

48:37 Yeat was on there. Even though I think that's a rage gaming I think that's his homie. Ye yeah, that's like when you sound yeah, yeah, yeah, instead of like god damn, Like when you see like a hot chick say goddamn, they'll be like yeah, yeah, like she's got the yachts. What it's a noun? Due, Yeah, it's all of it. I love it, dude, I do love that shit. I love like it's just like so niche Now it's so big because those streamers are giant. Yeah, but like there's a lot of stuff that came from Twitch. It's a different language. Yeah. I love that. Yeah, yeah, yeah, because I love cultures like that, Like how does culture start? And it literally started this kid said riz, Yeah is a lot of culture like in all the stupid like yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, this would make sense to someone who isn't part of that community.

49:22 Yeah, and I love that. Yeah, I love that even gets sturdy even though it's like more of a regional hip hop New York thing, but they popularize it on the internet. Yeah, it becomes a little exclusive if you're part of that culture. That's actually kind of a critical point of creating like communities of any side language language. Yeah, yeah, we have a little bit around here, but we don't have that much even hella. I love that now it's spread, but that yeah, our content doesn't is not really packed with that stuff, where other people's definitely is like all kinds of inside jokes and language stuff or whatever, which I think we're just too you know, not cool. I think I'm really not cool. Well, all y'all are saying you're currently Yeah, we say you're that's kind of kind of say ironically, and then I stopped saying it. I really like or Nerve Nor. I can't say. That's kind of like Australian too. I don't know, I'm just being lazy. Reminds me of Australians. Nor Nor, we're going to the Americans. I was saying, like brother like an ironically. Somebody suggested this, this riz GPT should should have been called Sereno because that's like the classic Sereno de Bergerac, classic story of a guy who was um pretty good looking but had no game at all, and he was fedlines uh from a guy who had a giant nose but was really good words.

50:54 Wait and yeah, this is my origin story. I feel like, I know. There's a really really good movie yeah with with Steve Martin. Okay, I think called Roxanne because the girl is Roxanne. It's Daryl Hannah now because of the police, not because of the rocks Sand. Oh. The best scene in any movie that features the song rock sand is Eddie Murphy in the jail cell in forty eight Hours, where he's like Eddie Murphy, He's he's wearing headphones. Okay, in in his jail cell and he's singing Roxanne off like out of tune, top of his fucking marms top. I think Jamie Fox at the hospital. Yeah, he's in a kind of rehab.

51:39 I'm sure what was think it was a stroke. Yeah, And then a lot of people came out said he's known for having high blood pressure for a long time and who knows what, but I'm glad he's right. Yeah, maybe new movies will wrap it up. I think Jim's kind of haircut. Oh yes, shit, I gotta go. Um. Ladies and gentlemen who episodes Wednesday Friday aviy Lou on Instagram, be sure to follow her. I'm selling mich where you want to find me through a speed dot coo. Big big, big, big, big, big, big sale coming in June. Was to pay attention to that and a couple of drops over the summer. We're locked and loaded. Um, that's it. I am at the Jimmy Dean and all the social media. This show is fifty percent Facts, where percent is a word and fifty is just number. Is fifty percent Facts is a speaker prime podcast in association with iHeartMedia on the Obscure Celebrity Network and I Gonna get the hell out of here,