Mikey Doucet: A former foster kid who taught himself to hope and dream

mikey doucet (00:06.414)
Is it? Can I barely see you guys?

Jim (00:06.704)
Is it? Can I barely see you guys or can you? Can you see us at all? Yeah, might just be framed a little. Mike might be a little bit of a kid. Yeah, we just have a big set that's normally like a little more horizontal and computers just want us to be a little more vertical.

mikey doucet (00:15.171)
That might be it.

mikey doucet (00:26.075)
Ah.

mikey doucet (00:29.41)
Can y'all see me?

Jim (00:29.988)
Is that better? Can y'all see me? Yeah, we can see you just fine. Yeah, you're framed up perfect. You know what's great? The cool thing is I can hear things perfectly. Good, good.

mikey doucet (00:32.854)
You know what's great? The cool thing is I can hear things perfectly.

Jim (00:46.997)
Oh, you can't hear it? Yeah, there should be right there. It should work. Or you can plug it into, you can do that too. Where our board up here, Sebastian is.

Can you hear through the computer? Yes, no, you can't.

Jim (01:05.388)
I'm sorry, there's always technical stuff. It's all good. Where are you at, man? Where are you from? So I'm actually, I live in Hammond, Louisiana. So it's a little bit north of New Orleans. Okay. Yeah, Louisiana's a spot I don't know well. I've been to New Orleans once maybe. Dude, it's, you got your country folk, you got, I mean, we're just diversity all across the board. Yeah.

mikey doucet (01:07.675)
It's all good.

mikey doucet (01:11.874)
So I'm actually, I live in Hammond, Louisiana. So it's a little bit north of New Orleans. Yeah.

mikey doucet (01:25.947)
That's, dude, it's, you got your country folk, you got, I mean, we're just diversity all across the board.

Jim (01:35.072)
Yeah, New Orleans was cool. Like the people were really cool. I'm not much of like a party or Bourbon Street guy. So we walked that a little bit, but like the culture you could feel and like the food, obviously in the architecture, that was all cool. Just the Bourbon Street. I don't know if that's my calling. Dude, I feel you man. Whenever, uh, so I'm from Southwest Louisiana, which is nowhere near New Orleans. And when I moved out this way, I got to experience Bourbon Street.

mikey doucet (01:50.998)
Dude, I feel you man. Whenever, so I'm from Southwest Louisiana, which is nowhere near New Orleans. And when I moved out this way, I got to experience Bourbon Street. And it was fun whenever you're incredibly young. But as you get older, you're like, eh. The music, the music and the culture and just everything is great about New Orleans with the history and it's just a...

Jim (02:04.756)
And it was fun whenever you're incredibly young. Yeah. But, uh, as you get older, you're like, eh, the music, the music and the culture, just everything is great about New Orleans with the history and it's just a, it's a beautiful place. Yeah. But the smell, some of the folks stomping around. Yeah. Maybe not.

mikey doucet (02:20.938)
It's a beautiful place.

mikey doucet (02:28.099)
Yeah. Hahaha. Dude, the smell is disgusting. Yeah.

Jim (02:28.372)
One of our... Dude, the smell is disgusting. Yeah, that's wild. Like, I don't know if you've been to Vegas, but obviously like another party street. But Vegas, I don't think has that smell. I don't know what's going on in the South. Dude, it's just, it's gotta be there for centuries. Yeah, swampy, swampy. Yeah. There we go. The humidity. Yeah. Where's Baton Rouge then? Is that more East? Yes, out West. LSU and all that?

mikey doucet (02:40.558)
Dude, it's just, it's gotta be there for centuries. Yeah. The humanity.

mikey doucet (02:53.478)
Yes, west, west of me. I'm centralized. So the great thing about where I live, the intersection of two massive interstates, 55, 10, and then there's also 12. So it's a very convenient location for traveling to Baton Rouge or New Orleans.

Jim (02:55.476)
Oh, it is West. West of me. I'm centralized. Okay. So the great thing about where I live, the intersection of two massive interstates, 55, 10, and then there's also 12. So it's, it's a very convenient location for traveling to Baton Rouge or New Orleans. Yeah. That's something a little different out there than here. Like you don't really drive anywhere out here.

you know, even to get to LA for us. Well, getting to LA is like six and a half hours. Everything's just so big. Whoa. Yeah, yeah. Where you could probably get to Texas and Kentucky in a day if you wanted. That's exactly right. Yeah.

mikey doucet (03:21.164)
Really?

mikey doucet (03:24.546)
Whoa, yeah.

mikey doucet (03:29.566)
That's exactly right.

Jim (03:33.376)
I do drive to LA, but yeah, it's kind of a bitch. And then the other thing north is like Portland and that's 10 hours. Yeah, Seattle's three more than that, right? Yeah, yeah, or more. Yeah, it takes forever. Depending on traffic and stuff. Yeah, it takes forever. The southern life. Yeah, man, the southern life is nice. You live down there your whole life then basically? That's a good question. I mean, if you guys discovered a little bit more about my story. Yeah.

mikey doucet (03:39.665)
Dude.

mikey doucet (03:49.002)
Yeah man, southern life is nice.

mikey doucet (03:53.73)
Uh, that's a good question. Uh, I mean, if you guys discovered a little bit more about my story, then I was, it's pretty much Southeast Texas and then all across the Southern piece of Louisiana, essentially.

Jim (04:00.804)
Then I was, it's pretty much southeast Texas, and then all across the southern piece of Louisiana essentially. Yeah. Where's that adventure start? Starts in a little town called Drag Creek, Louisiana. And that's kind of the southwest, like you said? Yes, yeah. I graduated with 50, I think 51 or 52 people.

mikey doucet (04:13.186)
starts in a little town called Dry Creek, Louisiana.

mikey doucet (04:21.726)
Yes, yeah. I graduated with 50, I think 51 or 52 people.

Jim (04:29.992)
In your high school? Yeah. Dang. Because I went to a tiny art school and so my graduating class was 24 people and that blows everyone's brains. That's strong. Yeah. Same kids for 13 years in the same class. Dude. Yeah, wild. Weird experience. That's kind of, if I didn't move around as much as I did, that would have been the similar story. Yeah, small town vibes. Real community at least though. It's kind of cool. It's kind of cool in one sense. Yeah. It is. Everybody knows everybody.

mikey doucet (04:31.146)
Yeah. Yeah, man.

mikey doucet (04:39.246)
That's strong.

mikey doucet (04:43.214)
Dude. That's kind of, if I didn't move around as much as I did, that would have been the similar story.

Mm-hmm. Yeah, yeah. It is, everybody knows everybody. You know, it's good in that way.

Jim (05:00.62)
You know, it's good in that way. Yeah, yeah, there's good and bad. It definitely kept me out of trouble. That's true. There you go. Yeah, mom taught there, so anything I do, I'm about to get yelled at by somebody. Tight community, yeah. Yeah, if your mom was a teacher, dude. Yeah, I was fucked. Yeah, yeah, you were, dude. Yeah, let's just give everybody the brief here, and then I can fill in about why I was interested in having you on the show.

mikey doucet (05:04.93)
That's true. There you go.

mikey doucet (05:09.766)
Ah, yeah dude, if your mom was a teacher dude, yeah. Yeah, yeah you are dude.

mikey doucet (05:29.41)
Come on.

Jim (05:29.592)
Yeah, maybe just a quick who you are, where you're from, what you're about. So yeah, I, I'm middle-aged dude who is like, let's, let's make a difference. Let's talk about something that is very uncomfortable that most people don't talk about and let's bring awareness to the table about being a former foster youth. What that journey's been like, the ups, the downs, a lot of downs.

mikey doucet (05:33.582)
So yeah, I'm a middle-aged dude who is like, let's make a difference. Let's talk about something that is very uncomfortable, that most people don't talk about, and let's bring awareness to the table about being a former foster youth, what that journey's been like, the ups, the downs, a lot of downs. But now in life, as I'm successful and growing and getting better, I wanna...

Jim (05:58.104)
But now in life as I'm successful and growing and getting better, I want to spread the news that we can make it.

mikey doucet (06:02.602)
spread the news that we can make it.

Jim (06:08.108)
Yeah, I mean, that's a great place to start because you don't hear a lot of stories about it. You know, I was incredibly lucky with my upbringing. We have some friends actually from Louisiana that sound like a similar story to you, our buddy Luke. But it's not something you hear a lot about and you don't know why necessarily. Is it because of success stories? Is it because they just tend to find their way and, and yeah, maybe don't bring awareness to it. So I think just in that fact alone that you don't hear about it.

is great reason to talk about it more. Thanks, brother. Yeah, I follow you on Instagram and you put out just a whole lot of positive message about dealing with difficult situations. And I mean, a lot of people, they don't have to be in the same situation that you were in to...

mikey doucet (06:40.398)
Thanks brother.

Jim (06:59.98)
Appreciate those messages, but at the same time the people who have been in that situation It's like you're it's like almost like you're speaking another vocabulary to them one that they recognize from their from their lived experience and So that's really why I wanted to talk to you get to know you a little bit Thank you, man What? What was like when did your foster experience start? Good question. I think I was eight years old actually I know is a

mikey doucet (07:16.174)
Thank you, man.

mikey doucet (07:23.938)
Good question. I think I was eight years old. Actually, I know I was eight. I have three other siblings and I'm the oldest of all four of us. And at the age of eight, my brother and I were first placed in our first foster home.

Jim (07:31.048)
I have three other siblings and I'm the oldest of all four of us. And at the age of eight, my brother and I were first placed in our first foster home. Is that something you want to talk about the circumstances? Like what leads most people to that world? Like what's like the, is there like one light switch that happens and

Now, you know, the government tries to step in or is it a slow process? I mean, obviously you're eight, but I'm sure you're more aware of situations of other people now at eight. You have no clue what the fuck's going on, but, uh, right on, dude. Yeah. Now, now maybe you're more aware of your own story or other people's stories at eight. I mean, you're fucking talking to dragons. Dude, dude. Yeah, man. I'm living in this, uh, well, I wish I could say I lived in this very terrible world.

mikey doucet (08:05.548)
Right on dude.

mikey doucet (08:12.162)
Dude, dude. Yeah, man, I'm living in this, well, I wish I could say I lived in this very terrible world, but I had to create something that I saw myself to be, which is who I am now, which is phenomenal, to say that a child that went through all that could be where I'm at. And anyways, gratitude there. But yes, I am okay with sharing.

Jim (08:23.64)
But I had to create something that I saw myself to be, which is who I am now, which is phenomenal, to say that a child that went through all that could be where I'm at. And anyways, gratitude there. But yes, I am okay with sharing. What I do know is that I think there was obviously abuse, neglect, trauma, all of it.

mikey doucet (08:41.298)
Um, what I do know is that I think there was obviously abuse, neglect, um, trauma, all of it, you name it. So we, we weren't, we didn't need to be in that situation anymore. And the state stepped in because of my grandfather.

Jim (08:52.544)
you name it. So we, we weren't, we didn't need to be in that situation anymore. And the state stepped in because of my grandfather and because of my grandfather, I'm where I'm at today. So anyways, that's a side story, but he essentially spoke up to, because it's,

mikey doucet (09:09.382)
And because of my grandfather, I'm where I'm at today. So anyways, that's a side story. But he essentially spoke up to, because his son is my father, and he told the state what was going on, and the rest is history.

Jim (09:21.784)
son is my father and he told the state what was going on and the rest is history. Have you had a chance to talk to him about that or since that because that in his own obviously being eight and what you're going through had to be incredibly difficult but even as a grown man as a grandpa that can't be an easy call or an easy file to file. Yes so with that being said

mikey doucet (09:46.986)
Yes, so with that being said, there's a twist to my grandfather. Uh, I actually got placed with him in legal guardianship and custody, and he actually placed me with multiple other families without the state even knowing. Yeah. So that's another reason why I'm speaking.

Jim (09:50.556)
there's a twist to my grandfather. I actually got placed with him in legal guardianship in custody and he actually placed me with multiple other families without the state even knowing. Oh my. Yeah so that's another reason why I'm speaking up. Yeah yeah it gets complicated. It does it's very complicated not just for me but every foster child or former foster youth.

mikey doucet (10:11.71)
It does. It's very complicated, not just for me, but every foster child or former foster youth, they all have unique situations that no one pieces the right piece to the puzzle.

Jim (10:19.716)
They all have unique situations that no one pieces the right piece of the puzzle.

Yeah. Longtime listeners of this program and the one that we did before this, Mike and I, know that I have like, I have a third kid who is not my biological kid and was never really lived with us, but almost did at third grade. His parents both were drug addicts at the time and

And then his father at some point left his mom and basically just started a different life, just kind of left everything else behind. And he was not the oldest kid, but the most responsible one. So he was taking care of his younger sisters. And it became obvious at some point that like, in the third grade, he was the one taking the food stamps and going to the grocery store. And...

Jim (11:34.248)
uh... we were on the point of offering to foster him and his grandmother stepped in his tis dads mom stepped in and uh... and took him at that point and then as an adult he was it was one in afghanistan and i was a walter reid for quite a while and we you know we were the only family that could be there and so uh... i was going to this paperwork over the weekend

Like, you know, when you do stuff for a wounded warrior with any one of the services, but this was the Army, you get like travel orders. They like take care of your flights, and if you're actually helping take care of a person, you get a certain amount of like pay or whatever. I just came across those the other day, because this was nine years ago now that this happened. And it was...

That's kind of the most one of the most profound experiences of my life just because I If we hadn't been able to be there, I'm not sure what would have happened and Obviously, we're you know Found family. We're not you know, he grew up with our younger son and He was in and out of our house a bunch but never lived with us, but we had that

parental responsibility over an adult that we had never really had before. It was a strange but good experience for all of us. He still calls me, you know, he just calls his mom and dad, you know, now. Because his parents are peripherally in his life, but not any kind of helpful or directive way, I guess is the best way to say it. Man, what you did is very honorable.

mikey doucet (13:03.725)
Yeah.

mikey doucet (13:15.678)
Man, what you did is very honorable. Thank you.

Jim (13:18.868)
Yeah, I mean I didn't feel that way at the time it felt like it felt like a responsibility It didn't feel like a decision I guess That's your good human being Yeah, yeah so We're back to your story you were saying that then your grandfather placed you with different folks Was any of that a good experience or was it all

mikey doucet (13:27.19)
That's your good human being.

Jim (13:47.82)
just difficult? O'Reilly It's all just difficult, you know, thinking about it. But it's made me who I am today. It gave me an opportunity to be around different situations, different families. When you're moving from this place to this place to this place, you're on your P's and Q's as much as you can be, so that way you don't get

mikey doucet (13:49.486)
It's all just difficult, you know, thinking about it, but it's made me who I am today. It gave me an opportunity to be around different situations, different families. When you're moving from this place to this place to this place, you're on your P's and Q's as much as you can be, so that way you don't get placed in another place.

mikey doucet (14:18.054)
I'd say it was very hard when I found out the truth and I've only learned the true within these past six months. Yeah, yeah. But it's okay. I've made my peace with it. I've made my peace with the situations that have happened. The realization happened one night when I was hanging out with my biological brother. We

Jim (14:18.492)
I'd say it was very hard when I found out the truth and I've only learned the true within these past six months. Oh shit. Yeah, yeah. But it's okay. I've made my peace with it. I've made my peace with the situations that have happened. The realization happened one night when I was hanging out with my biological brother.

we carried on until about 3 a.m. in the morning he came and visited just revisited our relation relationship in general but he said yeah man I went through the process and I was actually adopted so he got adopted when he was 12 and he was explaining how that situation happens and he asked me about my situation.

mikey doucet (14:46.946)
carried on until about 3 a.m. in the morning. He came and visited, just revisited our relationship in general. But he said, yeah man, I went through the process and I was actually adopted. So he got adopted when he was 12. And he was explaining how that situation happens. And he asked me about my situation because we had never seen each other.

Jim (15:15.064)
because we had never seen each other maybe moments. When he asked me about it, he was like, your grandfather was like your father. When you got placed with him, when you were put in legal guardianship, he was essentially your father. And his wife is your mother. It's weird how legal guardianship and custody is different than adoption.

mikey doucet (15:17.034)
maybe moments. When he asked me about it, he was like, your grandfather was like your father. When you got placed with him, when you were put in legal guardianship, he was essentially your father. And his wife is your mother. It's weird how legal guardianship and custody is different than adoption.

But when that happened, I loved him. I felt like he was everything. He was my savior. It was one of the happiest moments of my life, that he was my grandfather, and he was somebody I looked up to, that I resonated with, that I wanted to be like. He taught me hard work. He taught me to believe in myself. It's so weird how twisted this is.

Jim (15:44.664)
But when that happened, I loved him. I felt like he was everything. He was my savior. It was one of the happiest moments of my life that he was my grandfather and he was somebody I looked up to, that I resonated with, that I wanted to be like. He taught me hard work. He taught me to believe in myself. It's so weird how twisted this is.

mikey doucet (16:13.09)
But at the same time, I couldn't stay with him because I was a bad boy or I wasn't a good kid or I couldn't get along with his wife and their daughter. So he's like, look, I don't know what else to do. And then he put me with some quote unquote, friends of the family that I really didn't know. I called him mother, called him father.

Jim (16:13.54)
But at the same time, I couldn't stay with him because I was a bad boy, or I wasn't a good kid, or I couldn't get along with his wife and their daughter. So he's like, look, I don't know what else to do. And then he put me with some quote unquote, friends of the family that I really didn't know. I called him mother, called him father.

mikey doucet (16:42.366)
I have a new sibling. And then one day I show up and all my stuff's on their doorstep. And that's when reality checks in. And then I go to another home. That's friends of the family. And then I wind up here. I could keep going with it, but that's the gist of it.

Jim (16:42.848)
I have a new sibling. And then one day I show up and all my stuff's on their doorstep. And that's when reality checks in. And then I go to another home that's friends of the family. And then I wind up here. I could keep going with it, but that's the gist of it. What are those like pockets of time look like? Are they weeks, months?

years and obviously they vary but was there like any section where you're like alright I have some stability here.

mikey doucet (17:19.714)
Zero stability through it all. The only stability I've ever had is moving out here. I've been here for 15 years. I've met my wife out here. I've gained a sense of community and family. And because of the stability in my own life and what I've created, I can now say that I'm safe, happy and moving forward.

Jim (17:20.148)
Zero stability through it all. The only stability I've ever had is moving out here. I've been here for 15 years, met my wife out here, I've gained a sense of community and family and because of this stability in my own life and what I've created I can now say that I'm safe happy and moving forward.

mikey doucet (17:47.478)
But there was no stability in those situations.

Jim (17:47.928)
but there was no stability in those situations. It must have been very difficult and probably ongoing difficult situation to figure out how to not be on guard all the time. If, I mean, if you are a child who grew up in a situation that was constantly changing, you couldn't really trust that anything was going to stay the same and safe for any period of time. You had...

to just be really guarded. Is that, am I clocking that correctly or? You are. You're doing a good job. Yes. Very so much on guard. I've developed hypervigilance. Yeah. And the hypervigilance is good and bad. I've had to develop a lot of healing techniques over the years because

mikey doucet (18:22.378)
You are. You're doing a good job. Yes. Very so much on guard. I've developed hypervigilance and the hypervigilance is good and bad. I've had to develop a lot of healing techniques over the years because it's been fuel for me to know what situation's happening, if someone's being real.

Jim (18:46.048)
It's been fuel for me to know what situation is happening. If someone's being real, if they're lying to me, I can, I can, I can feel it out and no. So on guard, yes. But because of the forgiveness I've given them, I'm able to be where I'm at now. You say like healing techniques is, are you talking about just like things that

mikey doucet (18:51.654)
If they're lying to me, I can feel it out and know. So on guard, yes. But because of the forgiveness I've given them, I'm able to be where I'm at now.

Jim (19:12.404)
naturally occurred as a kid and a teenager and a young adult that you just like figured out? Or is that, do they help you with some of that stuff? Like is there counseling? Is there, I know, I don't know budgets, I don't know government stuff. Like do they have therapy budgets? Do they try to help these kids? Or is it something that you're just freaking?

Cause obviously like, yeah, cause like we do, like you said, like we figure out things that but they, I think when we figure them out on our own or we're forced to figure things out whether it's extreme or not extreme, it doesn't always tend to be good, right? Cause like, oh, humans just want to live. So you're going to go to like some crazy defense mechanism and like Jim said, yeah, maybe you just throw up walls everywhere and now you hate every, now you hate the world and you hate everyone because you're protecting yourself. Like that's probably not the best coping.

mikey doucet (19:33.898)
You're kinda just winging it, bro.

mikey doucet (19:49.182)
Right. That's right.

Jim (20:01.96)
to fit into society. So how do you, how did you manage from then till now know what that healing or what tools are good, what methods in your brain or your actions kind of serve you and which ones are maybe a default mechanism that might not serve you? Dude, honestly, when I was a kid, I just dreamed really hard. And as I got older, I dreamed even harder.

mikey doucet (20:23.478)
Dude, honestly, when I was a kid, I just dreamed really hard. And as I got older, I dreamed even harder. And even now, I dream even harder. I think that's what keeps me going, the dream, the belief of being something special, even though I was treated like I wasn't something special. I have to give myself that. I have to give myself the parenting techniques that I never got. I have to give myself the wisdom that I never got.

Jim (20:32.172)
And even now I dream even harder. I think that's what keeps me going. The dream, the belief of being something special, even though I was treated like I wasn't something special, I have to give myself that. I have to give myself the parenting techniques that I never got. I have to give myself the wisdom that I never got. I have to read books continuously. I have to put myself in a situation where I'm around great people.

mikey doucet (20:52.042)
I have to read books continuously. I have to put myself in a situation where I'm around great people, people that wanna get better, people that inspire themselves. If I'm surrounded by those type of people, then the vibrations will come my way, and then I can become better. So everything genuinely has been on my own. I don't think there was any government process as when I grew up in the 90s.

Jim (20:59.448)
people that want to get better, people that inspire themselves. If I'm surrounded by those type of people, then it'll, the vibrations will come my way and then I can become better. So everything genuinely has been on my own. I don't think there was any government process as when I grew up in the 90s that I'm aware of, especially whenever I got put in legal guardianship and custody.

mikey doucet (21:21.13)
that I'm aware of, especially whenever I got put in legal guardianship and custody. So I don't know if they were as involved at that point. When I was in care, I remember, I think my mother tried to tell me not to talk, not to say anything, not to speak. And she told me that everything that they say is a lie. So whenever I would go to therapy,

Jim (21:27.372)
So I don't know if they were as involved at that point. When I was in care, I remember, I think my mother tried to tell me not to talk, not to say anything, not to speak, and she told me that everything that they say is a lie, right, so whenever I would go to therapy, the times that I did, I would freeze up. I remember being a kid never speaking.

mikey doucet (21:50.614)
the times that I did, I would freeze up. I remember being a kid never speaking, never actually giving my emotions what they deserved. And when you have your adult in your life that tells you not to do that, not to speak, you look up to them and listen to them. So for years I was silent and just held it all inside.

Jim (21:56.972)
never actually giving my emotions what they deserved. And when you have your adult in your life that tells you not to do that, not to speak, you look up to them and listen to them. So for years I was silent and just held it all inside.

That had to be so difficult as a kid.

mikey doucet (22:19.25)
I don't really remember much, buddy. Yeah.

Jim (22:19.764)
I don't really remember much, buddy. Yeah. I know that in the foster systems in America, at least, there's very little that's done for, officially done for people as they become, as they reach the majority, let's say, when they turn 18.

and then suddenly they don't have a housing situation and they don't have a support situation. I know that is just very common. What was your experience like with aging out? Yeah, so I learned about that terminology and thought that's what happened to me. Aging out is whenever you're actually in care and then you're still part of the state's care and they have a process outside

mikey doucet (22:57.526)
Yeah, so I learned about that terminology and thought that's what happened to me. Aging out is whenever you're actually in care and then you're still part of the state's care and they have a process outside about when you do turn 18, in the state of Louisiana, I extended it to 21. So I didn't necessarily get those benefits due to legal guardianship in custody, but as I moved from home to home,

Jim (23:12.612)
when you do turn 18, in the state of Louisiana, I extended it to 21. So I didn't necessarily get those benefits due to legal guardianship in custody. But as I moved from home to home, couch served, stayed with one friend here one night, I eventually stayed persistent on my dream whenever I was a child, kept my schooling up.

mikey doucet (23:26.574)
couch served, stayed with one friend here one night. I eventually stayed persistent on my dream whenever I was a child, kept my schooling up, and I was able to go to a university here in Louisiana. And because of being able to go to Louisiana University, I met a really good friend, and he's from where I'm at now. I just took a whim and a leap of faith, moved out here with him one day.

Jim (23:39.18)
and I was able to go to a university here in Louisiana. And because of being able to go to Louisiana University, I met a really good friend and he's from where I'm at now. I just took a whim and a leap of faith, moved out here with him one day. I didn't want to be in a situation that I was in and just had some grit and determination and stayed with them in their apartment complex. You know, there was like,

mikey doucet (23:55.786)
I didn't want to be in a situation that I was in. And I just had some grit and determination and stayed with them in their apartment complex. You know, there was like, there was like five or six of us living in a two bedroom apartment. And they accepted me. They were my age. They were like, dude, we believe in you. Work hard and we're here for you. Wasn't even adults.

Jim (24:09.976)
There was like five or six of us living in a two bedroom apartment. Yeah. And they, they accepted me. They were my age. They were like, dude, we believe in you work hard and we're here for you. What is even adults? What is that dream when you're 16, 17, 18, you said you dreamed a lot. I try to dream a lot too, but the society tells me not to, but at 16, 17, 18, what, what is that dream? Was it college? Was it like this?

mikey doucet (24:31.147)
Yeah.

Yeah. Ha ha ha.

Jim (24:39.628)
you know, whatever, like white collar career or something, or was it, obviously it's to get out of what you're dealing with, but is there fun? Is there fun in the dream? Yeah, dude, there was a lot of fun in the dream. I remember, you know, this is crazy to say, I remember being 17 in high school and somebody took a photo of me. And they were like, dude, you could be a model. You could act or you could do this. And I was like,

mikey doucet (24:39.65)
Yeah.

No, dude.

mikey doucet (24:46.442)
Yeah, man, I shot for the stars. Yeah, dude, there was a lot of fun in the dream. I remember, you know, this is crazy to say. I remember being 17 in high school, and somebody took a photo of me. And they were like, dude, you could be a model. You could act, or you could do this. And I was like, OK. I'll kind of play off of that and listen to it. But that actually lit a fire.

Jim (25:10.452)
Okay. I'll kind of, I'll play off of that and listen to it. But that actually lit a fire. So whenever I did go to college, I did have the opportunity to do theater and act and do some different things and even try to do modeling before social media was what it was. Now everyone's a fucking model. All you need is an Instagram account. Bro. That's so dream came true.

mikey doucet (25:15.918)
So whenever I did go to college, I did have the opportunity to do theater and act and do some different things and even try to do modeling before social media was what it was. And I had fun with it. Bro, that's so the truth, man. Brother. Wow. Amen, brother. Right on, dude. Come on, blame me, dude. Dude, you're so right.

Jim (25:37.096)
Brother you will fucking Instagram modeling. We blame you for that Dude you're so right man, and that's another reason I just It's so weird being 35 and Seeing the world the way it is with social media blowing up so fast. Yeah Anyways, it's good and bad Mike I was the dream Mike just turned

mikey doucet (25:45.79)
And that's another reason I just... It's so weird being 35 and seeing the world the way it is with social media blowing up so fast. Anyways, it's good and bad. But that was the dream.

Jim (26:04.696)
35 so yeah they say our generation is like the craziest you know just from what we've known to see because we did go basically from vinyl to now and we're gonna see AI and we're probably gonna live on Mars together or some shit right on dude yeah fuck it's crazy it's crazy we have a bunch of all our employees are like early 20s I just feel so like cassette tapes yeah at cassette tapes I'm listening to fucking Nelly rap music on cassette

mikey doucet (26:08.11)
Dude.

mikey doucet (26:16.686)
Man, right on dude, let's go. Ha ha ha. It's totally crazy, man.

Dude, isn't that weird?

mikey doucet (26:32.15)
right on dude. Dude I got a vinyl, that's what's behind me, you know? Like, cuz it just feels organic. It doesn't feel digitized, like it's yeah. Anyways, there's some simplicity in our generation and other generations too.

Jim (26:32.248)
Ain't nobody doing that. Yeah. I know Did I got a vinyl let's what's behind me, right? Yeah. Yeah, you know, it's wild just feels Organic. Yeah, it is a lot more raw ties like it's yeah Anyways, there's some simplicity in our generation and other generations, too Yeah, I just re-bought the same stereo receiver that I bought with my high school graduation money. I just bought refurbished one

And I fucking love it. It makes me feel so good. It's difficult to describe why and how it makes me feel good, but it touches a lot of memories about a time in my life that seems really so, so far away until I'm kind of with that. And it just sort of brings it all back. That's right, dude. We have to have some simplicity in life. Yeah, for sure.

mikey doucet (27:02.102)
Dude.

mikey doucet (27:22.99)
That's right dude. We have to have some simplicity in life.

Jim (27:28.744)
So what are you doing now? I actually have a pretty awesome career. I work for a home builder. It's amazing to be homeless and now helping families with their dreams. Wow. Their homes. Yeah, man, it's a powerful experience. I get to serve and help and have that authenticity whenever they're like, man, I really be in a home. I get to be there and say.

mikey doucet (27:31.682)
I actually have a pretty awesome career. I work for a home builder. It's amazing to be homeless and now helping families with their dreams, their homes. Yeah, man, it's a powerful experience. I get to serve and help and have that authenticity whenever they're like, man, I really be in a home. I get to be there and say, I'm gonna help you with that. I'm gonna make sure you get to be in a beautiful home.

Jim (27:57.708)
I'm gonna help you with that. I'm gonna make sure you get to be in a beautiful home. Keep it in your budget. Make sure you have an awesome experience because I remember what it was like not to have a home and I want them to have a home.

mikey doucet (28:00.662)
Keep it in your budget. Make sure you have an awesome experience because I remember what it was like not to have a home. And I want them to have a home.

Jim (28:11.956)
That's really great. I can see that there's a certain, what's the word I'm looking for? Help me, Mike. There's a certain, it just fits. That fits very well with what you're saying. It's almost like it was by design. Yeah, yeah, almost, yeah. I have seen other people talk about the use of fitness for

mikey doucet (28:25.754)
It's almost like it was by design.

Jim (28:41.568)
for kids who were in foster situations in terms of helping them develop greater sense of self-esteem and whatever. Have you seen like that in the world and was that a part of your journey at all? Yes, definitely. Fitness is a savior for me. If it's not in my life, then I'm not as happy. Yeah. I remember being a chubby kid or a husky.

mikey doucet (28:55.006)
Yes, definitely. Fitness is a savior for me. If it's not in my life, then I'm not as happy. I remember being a chubby kid or a husky because when I was in care or before care, obviously neglect and starvation essentially. Whenever I got in care, I remember one of the first things.

Jim (29:11.8)
Because when I was in care or before care Obviously neglect and starvation essentially Whenever I got in care, I remember one of the first things that I ate was a double whopper And dude that double whopper was so good Man and like when I eat cereal I'd pour like a whole tongue of sugar on it, right? Yeah

mikey doucet (29:23.954)
that I ate was a double whopper. And dude, that double whopper was so good. Oh man. And like when I eat cereal, I'd pour like a whole ton of sugar on it, right? So anyways, I gained a little weight. And as I gained weight, when you're, I'm sure kids are feeling it today, but whenever I was a kid, it was like,

Jim (29:41.088)
So anyways, I gained a little weight. And as I gained weight, when you're, I'm sure kids are feeling it today, but whenever I was a kid it was like you were picked on for being a heavy set and it just, it was a lot. And then you factor in all the trauma and then you want to fit in because you're an outsider because you don't really have a stable family.

mikey doucet (29:52.818)
you were picked on for being a heavy set. And it just, it was a lot. And then you factor in all the trauma and then you wanna fit in because you're an outsider because you don't really have a stable family. You put all that into play and then you lose a lot of weight because you don't know what you're doing. You basically restart yourself, you know.

Jim (30:09.868)
you put all that into play and then you lose a lot of weight because you don't know what you're doing you basically restart yourself you know and then I played a little baseball and I was like I gotta I gotta put on some muscle I gotta do something I lose I lost all this weight I lost all this muscle mass like how do I get it back. So the fitness journey for me.

mikey doucet (30:20.99)
And then I played a little baseball and I was like, I gotta put on some muscle. I gotta do something. I lost all this weight. I lost all this muscle mass. Like, how do I get it back? So the fitness journey for me really started when I was probably about 19. When I moved out here, I saw a guy in the gym. He's 10 years older than me. And...

Jim (30:38.696)
really started when I was probably about 19. When I moved out here, I saw a guy in the gym, he's 10 years older than me, and saw him pumping weights. I was like, dude, I wanna be like you. He was working out, and he's like, show up at five a.m. the next morning, and I did. And the rest is history. Without that fitness foundation, I wouldn't be as secure and stable as I am now.

mikey doucet (30:51.318)
saw him pumping weights. I was like, dude, I wanna be like you. He was working out, he's like, show up at 5 a.m. the next morning. And I did. And the rest is history. Without that fitness foundation, I wouldn't be as secure and stable as I am now.

Jim (31:07.948)
Is there any like, I guess coping would be the negative, but any like positive foundation in your younger years, high school or junior high type stuff? Because even me, and you read it everywhere and who knows who to believe, because again, everyone's a fucking Instagram model and Instagram CEO. But all these like CEOs and stuff, they talk about like their routines. And I've never heard anyone talk about why they have routine, but.

mikey doucet (31:26.412)
Right on.

Jim (31:32.004)
through years of therapy and whatever, right? We talk about stability and stability's through routine because you know what's gonna come, right? So you build these routines, so things are predictable and then you can make adjustments, like many science projects. And so, to me it makes sense where, you know, running companies myself, my life feels very chaotic and things can pop up out of anywhere, nowhere, and I'm traveling and I just flew in last night and I gotta fly in again next Tuesday and you know, my life's crazy, so I build this routine that kinda holds me steady in the middle of that.

Okay, I work out at 8 a.m.s, I eat at 3 p.m.s, I go to bed at 10 p.m.s, because everything else is fucking chaos in my life. Now you throw that exponential into what sounds like your childhood, and you have real chaos. Did you ever default to something, besides maybe dreaming and stuff like that? Was there anything that you found before 19 that helped you find some kind of, I always think of, you ever see Inception?

mikey doucet (32:27.51)
Yes. Yeah. Right, right, right.

Jim (32:27.94)
The movie? I always think of that totem too, you know? Like when my life is, and they say that. Therapy teaches you that during like anxiety attacks. Like just feel the ground, like stare at your fucking toes. You know your toes are real. You know the ground's real. That's what I'm touching right now. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So you just always know, yeah, I bite the shit on my nails. Like, all right, this shit's real, you know? And so there's always something holding you steady when you don't feel, I guess, in control in some sense. And you had the ultimate sense of no control. Two things. I love to read.

mikey doucet (32:34.774)
Right on. Yes, right on dude. That's what I'm touching right now. Ha ha ha.

mikey doucet (32:53.858)
Two things I love to read and I'm incredibly curious. The more I can read, the more I can learn, the more I'm with that person that is in the book. So that allowed me a lot of freedom. So I stayed in the books all those years, you know, when we grew up, Harry Potter, even though, so that, yes, I was. Yeah, I was.

Jim (32:58.412)
And I'm incredibly curious. The more I can read, the more I can learn, the more I'm with that person that is in the book. So that allowed me a lot of freedom. So I stayed in the books all those years. You know, when we grew up, Harry Potter. Yeah. Even though, so- You were talking to dragons. Yes, I was. Yeah, I was. I'll say this too. I did talk to a lot of Jesus.

mikey doucet (33:22.87)
I'll say this too, I did talk to a lot of Jesus. I think that as a child, I didn't understand it. I still am learning it, spirituality and all that. But as a kid that did kind of give me a little bit of hope. I think that in the books, I just believed that I was gonna be okay, somehow.

Jim (33:27.736)
uh... you know i think that the child i didn't understand it i still am learning it spirituality and all that but uh... as a kid that did kind of give me a little bit of you know i think uh... i think that in the books i just believe that i was gonna be okay did you learn that from somewhere was there somewhere along the journey that

someone with faith or that had a routine of church and community that you saw? Or was it more through reading? Yeah. When you grow up in a small town in the south, that's basically, bro, everybody goes to church. Growing up that way, you're always in a pulpit on a Sunday. Not a pulpit, but in the pews on a Sunday. And you're just trying to understand what they're telling you about.

mikey doucet (34:01.654)
Yeah, when you grow up in a small town in the south, that's basically, bro, everybody goes to church. Growing up that way, you're always in a pulpit on a Sunday, not a pulpit, but in the pews on a Sunday, and you're just trying to understand what they're telling you about. So I would read the Bible, I would try to listen, and I find out that all humans are fallible.

Jim (34:24.556)
So I would read the Bible, I would try to listen, and I find out that all humans are fallible. But that one story, every time I'd read it about Jesus, I was like, it makes sense. I think it's the one hero throughout all these years that if I ever look at any of the stories, I'm like, man, that dude was pretty cool. So not that I'm a holy roller or anything like that.

mikey doucet (34:32.322)
Um, but that one story, every time I'd read it about Jesus, I was like, makes sense. I think it's the one hero throughout all these years that if I ever look at any of the stories, I'm like, man, that dude was pretty cool. So not that I'm a Holy roller or anything like that. I just think that kind of helped me growing up as a kid. And even today.

Jim (34:54.328)
I just think that kind of helped me growing up as a kid, and even today.

Yeah, I'm having grown up the way that I did in, you know, in church and whatever. I'm not a huge fan of religion at this point in my life, but I am, I cannot argue against spirituality and that whatever helps people feel more connected to a larger world.

Jim (35:24.256)
For sure. I mean, the town I grew up in was essentially a small town in the South, but it was in California and it wasn't in the South of California. Rural California is not really the same thing as urban California. No, for sure not. Yeah, I think one thing that makes California a little different in the South is generational stuff. You know, like you said, probably who's in your small town, their great grandpa grew up in that town. That's super rare out here.

mikey doucet (35:32.27)
Mmm. Haha.

mikey doucet (35:40.214)
Mmm.

Jim (35:53.36)
You know, I think I have one friend that has a family like that, but I mean, my mom's from Argentina, my dad's from Cleveland, his dad's from Italy. Like we moved everywhere where if you're in like the South or obviously like Massachusetts and shit like that, you may be able to go back like six generations. So like the forming of community almost seems a little better out there. And like you said, if everyone goes to church, that's just part of what the community does. And whether you believe in the church or not, to me at least, it almost doesn't matter. You got that community, you got that core.

mikey doucet (36:14.826)
Right. That's right.

Jim (36:21.912)
You know, you got something where, that's something I've, we obviously try to build it here at the gym because I think it's such a lacking piece in the West Coast. Even America as a whole, for sure. You compare it to other countries and like community is very hard to come by because we're so grandiose of a nation. There's so many people, so many moving parts, money. You take all these things into account, people moving, jobs, et cetera. It's hard to find like that core human. So they ain't gotta be your best friends.

mikey doucet (36:28.13)
Yeah.

Jim (36:51.736)
but you know Sally runs the coffee shop and you go fuck and say hi to Sally. You know, there's something again in that stability rather than going to Starbucks and seeing a new barista every day, you know, not waving to your neighbor. There's something, you always kind of feel like you're a stranger in your own town. Small. Yeah, yeah small's kind of good I think sometimes. Yeah, I think you definitely can. Yeah, I'm glad I live where I live. You know, I think we're a community of about 20,000.

mikey doucet (37:00.522)
Mmm

mikey doucet (37:11.422)
Yeah, I'm glad to live where I live. You know, I think we're a community of about 20,000, but we have a university. Yeah, we have a major Louisiana university, Southeastern Louisiana University. And because of that, there's a lot of opportunity and there's a great sense of community because of it.

Jim (37:23.755)
Yeah, we have a major Louisiana University, Southeastern Louisiana University. And because of that, there's a lot of opportunity and there's a great sense of community because of it.

Jim (37:45.766)
What can people do to help people who are outside of this, people who don't have experience with the foster system, people who were never in care or whatever, or even disconnected from family the way that you were?

Physically emotionally I don't want to layer that question, but why is it even that we don't talk about it? That's a question. I don't have an answer for at all. You guys are talking about it right now Yeah, yeah, but you know what I mean like yeah, but you took the leap and you asked me and I'm very grateful for it But like you know I think it's dirty dude. Yeah, I think a lot of people are like even the reason that I'm standing up is because I think there are a lot of people who are dealing with shame and

mikey doucet (38:16.09)
You guys are talking about it right now? Y'all, yeah, but you took the leap and you asked me and I'm very grateful for it. I think it's dirty, dude. I think a lot of people are like, even the reason I'm standing up is because I think there are a lot of people who are dealing with shame. And there's a limitless amount of abuses that happen to children that are in care.

Jim (38:38.564)
There's a limitless amount of abuses that happen to children that are in care. And that's what people don't like talking about. They don't like talking about the dirty stuff. They don't like talking about the abuse that's continuous every single day and that hurts and that causes people to be incarcerated and aging out and all the data and the stats. It's horrible. It's not happy.

mikey doucet (38:44.35)
And that's what people don't like talking about. They don't like talking about the dirty stuff. They don't like talking about the abuse that's continuous every single day and that hurts and that causes people to be incarcerated and the aging out and all the data and the stats. It's horrible. It's not happy. So I think that might be one of the reasons.

Jim (39:06.384)
I think that might be one of the reasons. But like some reason, like you know, you listen to the Rogans or some people with big platforms, they're talking about the prison system, which is arguably, you know, fucked up. Maybe not as fucked up because now we're talking kids who have no control. So you're right, it is a hair darker. But like the prison system's fucked and private prisons, like politics are obviously fucked and people want to talk about that all day every day.

Religion has its fucked parts and people want to talk about that all day every day and people want to talk about social media Dramas and yeah and stuff like that. That's yeah, this may be not as dark, but it's definitely negative but for some reason Yeah, maybe do you think it is the shame makes sense? Although it doesn't actually make sense because the poor kids have zero to do with it, right? So to be shameful for something you have zero control of I know that's human nature, but it makes you know makes no logical sense

but it makes sense to me why they feel shame because they had to go through this process. They're so different. They're outcasts or they feel that way. But do you think there's, and obviously it sounds like that's part of your side mission besides your careers to bring awareness to it. But have you found others that talk about it or try or like a bigger name or speech? Our buddy Luke, yeah, who's from New Orleans, had a similar path. And I think, you know, what's funny about that. Yeah. His stepmom worked.

mikey doucet (40:17.686)
You know what's funny about that? His stepmom actually works with me or did. She just retired. Yeah, no, I'm not kidding.

Jim (40:22.1)
actually works with me or did she just retired on the way while and i'm not kidding yet louisiana small town yellows a good dude and uh... i think we've literally you know grew up on the streets for a good chunk of what he was going through uh... so even the dirtiness of the government didn't even help him you know it sounds a little similar to your story where government just even know what you're going through in some senses cuz you had a guardianship uh...

mikey doucet (40:28.491)
Yeah, dude.

mikey doucet (40:46.455)
Right.

Jim (40:49.756)
And I think Luke's open to talk about it for sure, but, uh, you know, and we talked about it with him on his thing, but on our podcast, but there's just, doesn't seem to be as many people that it sounds like, and I don't know the data that go through the system. It doesn't seem as many people want to speak on it to try to help it. I think we're such a marginalized piece of society. There's only around 440,000 foster children right now.

mikey doucet (41:07.15)
I think we're such a marginalized piece of society. There's only around 440,000 foster children right now. So that might be it. We're such a small piece of the community that may not often be thought of.

Jim (41:19.588)
So that might be it. Yeah. We're such a small piece of the community that may not often be thought of.

Jim (41:30.8)
As an aside about Luke, I started watching season two of Heels. And both Luke and PJ, his son, are in episode one. Yeah. It just feels good to see them there. Particularly Luke, although I think that he's had struggles as an adult and as a parent and stuff too. And so...

Knowing that what their relationship like is like now is really cool Yeah, but just seeing them on screen is just great. Is there is there a I don't want to draw conclusions And it sounds like you're a big reader. So maybe you do know some of the data Is there is there a coincidence there that two of our friends? That kind of went through that world are from Louisiana Is there a southern like obviously it's not as you know wealthy of a state or areas other places is there a larger?

you know drugs are bad everywhere but is there a reason why is it is their foster system crazy in louisiana for some reason or the percentages uh... i think i recently learned that there's about thirty three hundred foster children currently yeah so maybe a slightly big piece of the pie compared to other states potentially yeah i think the demographics might be maybe per capita there might be a larger association of in it

mikey doucet (42:34.919)
I think I recently learned that there's about 3,300 foster children currently.

mikey doucet (42:45.25)
Potentially, I think the demographics might be maybe per capita. There might be a larger association in oven. Um, I'm, I'm still learning about it every day because I'm not an expert. I'm just an expert on me and my story. And I, I hate to say that I could represent former foster youth or foster care, foster care as a whole, but you might be onto something there.

Jim (42:55.undefined)
I'm still learning about it every day because I'm not an expert. I'm just an expert on me and my story and I'd hate to say that I could represent Former foster youth or foster care foster care as a whole But you might be onto something there, yeah Yeah, I mean it makes sense in my brain and again I know I know none of the data, but that's a pretty random coincidence You know and I could even feel it. I think I when I visited New Orleans was 2017 2016

and you could feel the Katrina stuff. You know, we drove through a certain neighborhood and you're like, oh fuck, you know, like, and I know Luke spoke on that a little bit about growing up doing some of that stuff to us, either on air or off air. So it obviously had a large effect of what was going on there. And then, and then yeah, depending on who your governor is, right, and who your mayor is, different government things step in or don't, you know, depending on, yeah, their budgets and where they put their emphasis to get voted back into the system.

mikey doucet (43:25.462)
Yeah.

mikey doucet (43:38.679)
I mean...

mikey doucet (43:51.062)
When you think that the median income of one person where I live currently is only about $17,000, I mean, it just goes to show that we're a very poverty-stricken state.

Jim (43:53.656)
The median income of one person where I live currently is only about $17,000. Yeah. Wow. I mean, it just goes to show that we're a very poverty stricken state. Yeah. Yeah, the only other person I talked to a lot about this with is my buddy Simon who stepped into the strength conditioning YouTube space in his mid-20s, but he worked for the government in Albuquerque, and he has a lot of stories.

kind of basically being a counselor and traveling around some of the deserts out there and seeing where people are living and how they're living, the poverty, the kids, nightmares of stories, you know? And same thing. You just don't hear that talked about. When people talk or like, I don't want to say joke, but you know, they'll say something like that, they always talk about like a third world country. You know, they'll talk about Africa or they'll talk about Columbia or they'll talk about all these things, but like it's literally happening in every state here.

You know, and I guess that's why I'm speaking out, buddy. Yeah. I think, I think you would have never known based on my career, based on where I'm at, based on the accolades of, Oh, he successfully graduated college, you know, and, and he's where he's at. I think that's why I'm speaking out. Cause you never know who you're talking to. Yeah. Many years to get you there, you know,

mikey doucet (44:53.294)
I think that's why I'm speaking out, buddy, because I think you would have never known, based on my career, based on where I'm at, based on the accolades of, oh, he successfully graduated college, you know, and where he's at. I think that's why I'm speaking out, because you never know who you're talking to.

mikey doucet (45:19.171)
Right on.

Jim (45:20.304)
Yeah, it didn't just happen. I guess that goes back to Jim's original question. Yeah, what's the help? I mean, awareness is always a piece, right? And that's always the start and conversations always get the ball rolling. But where's the, you know, have you done any research yourself besides being like an advocate of where, you know, the average Joe can step in and help or do anything, I guess. There are a lot of nonprofits that support children who are aging out of the foster care system.

mikey doucet (45:41.698)
There are a lot of nonprofits that support children who are aging out of the foster care system. There are a lot of places that you can dedicate your time to, money, you can just look up a nonprofit and give back, or you can just have a good conversation like we're doing. I think those would definitely help. I think legislations, I actually tried to formulate a bill to help with

Jim (45:49.628)
There are a lot of places that you can dedicate your time to money you can just look up a non-profit and give back or you can just have a good conversation like we're doing. I think those would definitely help I think legislations I actually try to formulate a bill to help with the fact that I had this happen to me through legal guardianship and

mikey doucet (46:10.666)
The fact that I had this happen to me through legal guardianship and custody.

And it didn't make it to committee, but that's okay. I think that there's opportunity for me to keep speaking about it and try to change some laws, try to help the children out there that need it. So I think legislation is part of it. You can talk to your local politician, let them know that, hey, this guy that I talked to has been through all this. What can we do to make a difference?

Jim (46:18.904)
and it didn't make it to committee, but that's okay. I think that there's opportunity for me to keep speaking about it and try to change some laws, try to help the children out there that need it. So I think legislation's part of it. You can talk to your local politician, let them know that, hey, this guy that I talked to has been through all this, what can we do to make a difference?

It seems like something that should be an easy bipartisan issue. It's kids, but that doesn't always play out that way at all. Well, people don't really talk about it. Yeah, they don't really talk about it. My really good friend, Henry, was one of my first mentors growing up. Just moved back to town and I was chatting with him and yeah, they have a nonprofit that I think sadly has to frequent Louisiana, but there is kind of like during natural disaster type situations. Him and his buddies started a nonprofit that basically go and try to help the kids during that.

mikey doucet (46:50.999)
It doesn't.

Jim (47:12.016)
because you think again, stability and chaos. So the parents are worried about insurance and the parents are worried about this and that during a flood or a wildfire. Or they've lost their parents. Yeah, that too. But yeah, so then what's going on with the kids? You're six years old, are they gonna sit in these insurance meetings? So they go out and they literally fly overnight to these big extreme events and try to do like pop-up camps. So like rent a school or they'll find a gymnasium and they'll grab all the kids during this chaotic time and just start playing games with them or teaching them how to paint or playing dodge ball.

I was like, oh, do you have like a method? He's like, yeah, we have some like, you know, therapeutic type methods, cause some data shows that if you, if you kind of nip it in the bud during this chaos, maybe we could help ease the long-term effects on their mentals of losing their child at home or whatever it may be. And he's like, but a lot of it's just playing, man. They're fucking kids. You know, they just want, they just need to like not be locked into some kind of shelter and start playing with other kids, whether they know them or not. But you don't hear about that stuff, you know, you hear about.

mikey doucet (47:59.022)
That's right.

Jim (48:10.392)
You hear about Florida not taking all state insurance because of hurricanes or whatever the hell. You hear about all this adult shit. You don't hear about, yeah, the real, and that's fine. Yeah, it sucks to be an adult, and shitty things happen to adults as well, but the escalation of how shitty it is for someone younger is monumental. We can't even calculate how much crazier it is when you're smaller.

mikey doucet (48:13.926)
Mm, yeah. That's right.

mikey doucet (48:34.434)
I agree.

Jim (48:35.056)
I agree. So, we live in a society, and it's sort of a really, I'm tarring everybody with the same brush here, but people who had difficult childhoods often develop more of a victim mentality and don't, are not looking to move forward positively their,

deriving their esteem from people seeing them as someone who was damaged and... Milk in it. We could hit him in the face because some people are shitters. And stop milk in it. You can be honest, bro. Yeah, this is just my guess, man. Go for it. You were not doing that as far as I can tell. Is that something innate or was that a decision?

mikey doucet (49:10.146)
Hmm.

mikey doucet (49:14.558)
Yeah, dude, you can be honest, bro. This is Joel's podcast, man. Go for it. Ha ha ha.

mikey doucet (49:22.53)
Thanks, man.

mikey doucet (49:29.102)
That's a great question. Man, y'all are doing great. Seriously, congrats, man. I don't wanna be a victim. I don't wanna associate with being a victim. I wanna associate with being a victor. I wanna push past all the negativity and the hurt and the trauma. I mean, it came back. That's why I'm speaking out, because it victimized me.

Jim (49:29.796)
That's a great question man y'all make y'all are doing great seriously congrats man. I don't want to be a victim I don't want to associate with being a victim I want to associate with being a victor I want to push past all the negativity and the hurt and the trauma I mean it came back and that's why I'm speaking out because it victimized me.

mikey doucet (50:01.271)
I started getting incredibly stressed out. Remember when the interest rates were amazing? Well, families were building homes left and right. Well, that was a lot of stress. And I built my second home in that time. So all of these feelings and emotions and hypervigilance kicked in. And all those years where I was like thinking that

Jim (50:02.009)
I started getting incredibly stressed out. Remember when the interest rates were amazing? Yeah. Well, families were building homes left and right. Right. Well, that was a lot of stress. And I built my second home in that time. So all of these feelings and emotions and hypervigilance kicked in. And all those years where I was like thinking that

mikey doucet (50:28.51)
I'm not going to associate with being a foster child. I'm going to associate with being someone successful, chasing a dream.

Jim (50:29.236)
I'm not going to associate with being a foster child. I'm going to associate with being someone successful, chasing a dream.

mikey doucet (50:38.538)
I forgot and I disassociated so hard that it hurt me. So it was a dance. I'm not a victim. I am a victor today. I don't want to take that approach and I'm not going to say woe is me because I believe anyone, no matter who you are, where you came from, you have the ability to choose with your mindset.

Jim (50:39.284)
I forgot and I disassociated so hard that it hurt me. So it was a dance. I'm not a victim. I am a victor today. I don't want to take that approach and I'm not going to say woe is me because I believe anyone, no matter who you are, where you came from, you have the ability to choose with your mindset.

mikey doucet (51:08.234)
and your heart and your spirit and become who you want to be. You just have to choose it. Now we all grow up in different situations with trauma or struggles. That's the human journey. And the hero's journey is a real thing. And I'm going to take it and run with it. I'm going to choose positivity, love, direction, authenticity.

Jim (51:08.972)
and your heart and your spirit and become who you want to be. You just have to choose it. Now we all grow up in different situations with trauma or struggles. That's the human journey. And the hero's journey is a real thing. And I'm going to take it and run with it. I'm going to choose positivity, love, direction, authenticity.

mikey doucet (51:37.822)
and give back in that way and just show that you can be a good human no matter what's happened to you. Now I don't have to live around those people that hurt me and I choose not to be around them but I'm not going to choose to be a victim. I'm not going to choose to stay in a negative mindset every single day. I'm going to choose to do what it takes to be positive and live an encouraging life.

Jim (51:38.548)
and get back in that way and to show that you can be a good human no matter what's happened to you now i don't have to live around those people that hurt me and choose not to be around them but i'm not going to choose to be a victim i'm not going to choose to stay in a negative mindset every single day i'm going to choose to do what it takes to be positive and live an encouraging life do you think some of those

Like when's the first time some of those lessons popped into your head? Like, like high school years, a little bit before. Cause like, I think Jim's question is good. Like, yeah, did you choose that or did it choose you again, just to go, you know, broad brush on everyone. I think a lot of people that ended up in like some victim stuff haven't handled like real shit, you know, they had, they had speed bumps, but you, you were fighting walls, you're fighting mountains, you know, like your situation was real, it's kind of life or death for a lot of situations and you really got to push your way through that.

mikey doucet (52:27.278)
Hmm.

Jim (52:37.792)
And to push your way through that, you build yourself up, right? Because you're relying on yourself to get shit done. And if you get shit done, you proved yourself, you can get shit done. And then you just rinse repeat. And now it seems you're doing great, right? Cause you rinse repeated enough years where if you have like little shit happened to you, you know, you're, you're crying every day. Cause you got a flat tire and that's the worst thing you've ever come across in your life. It's real easy to go. Whoa. Is me.

You know, call AAA, fix your tire, bitch about it for a week until the next small thing happens. Now you got a crack in your window, you're going to bitch about that for another week, you know. But real trial and tribulations, and that comes in a broad scope, obviously. There's a lot of tough things that happen to a lot of, you know, good people in the world. But that, in one way, kind of like forced you to be that way, do you think? Yeah. I didn't choose it. Yeah, right. It chose me.

mikey doucet (53:23.404)
Yeah, I didn't choose it. It chose me.

Jim (53:28.276)
I say that all the time, man. I be bitching at kids in our gym. Because especially in fitness, right? It's like, wake up, take a cold bath, do something hard. And I said, there's a very big difference. And I've lived an amazing life. I'm so lucky in many ways. Not that my life's been perfect. I've dealt with my own shit. But there's a huge difference in life with how you stay disciplined when things and hard things are forced upon you rather than choosing to work out really hard.

mikey doucet (53:30.719)
Hahaha!

mikey doucet (53:34.314)
Yeah. Dude, I know right?

Jim (53:58.336)
or choosing to run in the sun, or choosing to stay two minutes longer in the sauna. Do those build character? Sure, maybe in like the smallest scale, but how do you act when real life slaps you in the face and you have no control? How do you move through life then? What's your mentality then? It's easy to fake smile in a cold tub.

every morning. I'm sorry if you're a cold plunger buddy. I don't mean to blast your morning routine. Everyone's fucking, yeah, fuck that shit. It's incredibly traumatizing. Dude, we worked on insulation and fucking AC and heat for the last hundred years. I'm going to utilize it. We're not cavemen. But joking aside, that's a huge movement in fitness. And obviously all of them have a discount code for a cold plunge. And so it all ties into money. But people act like this discipline to show up to the gym is the same discipline for you to even just lift.

mikey doucet (54:23.318)
No, I'm not. I tried it and it's incredibly traumatizing

mikey doucet (54:34.23)
Right on.

Jim (54:50.629)
Lift your eyelids in the morning at 10 years old when chaos is around you and they're not the same. They're not the fucking same thing

mikey doucet (54:55.52)
Mmm.

Bro, that's truth. But everything's all about perspective. So that tire flat, that may be one of the worst things I've ever experienced. You're right about that. I...

Jim (54:58.5)
Bro, that's, that's true. But, everything's all about perspective. So, that tire flat, that may be one of the worst things I've ever experienced. You're right about that. I...

mikey doucet (55:14.571)
I don't know.

Jim (55:15.328)
I don't know...

mikey doucet (55:18.634)
I'm just going to accept it for what it is. You know, I had all these challenges growing up. I still have challenges today. But dude, I can honestly say thank you for it because I'm not afraid to ask for someone's business. I'm not afraid to come on this podcast. I'm not afraid to put myself out there. I mean, I do have fear. But those hard times.

Jim (55:19.372)
I'm just going to accept it for what it is. You know, I had all these challenges growing up. I still have challenges today. But dude, I can honestly say thank you for it because I'm not afraid to ask for someone's business. I'm not afraid to come on this podcast. I'm not afraid to put myself out there. I mean, I do have fear. But those hard times.

mikey doucet (55:47.594)
I didn't have anybody else. I had to have myself. And I had to push myself. And I had to get, I don't know, fight those demons, man. Slay that dragon, dude. You know? Talk to that dragon.

Jim (55:48.384)
I didn't have anybody else. I had to have myself. And I had to push myself. And I had to get, I don't know, fight those demons, man. Slay that dragon, dude. Yeah. You know? Talk to that dragon. Yeah. Well, I really want to thank you for being on the show and sharing with us. I think this is an important conversation. Hopefully this will be, will inspire other people to.

talk about this issue more and find something to do about it. Where can people find you? They can find me on Instagram. It's easy. It's Mikey Ducet. M-I-K-U-Y D-O-U-C-E-T. I'm also on YouTube. Same thing, Mikey Ducet. And I'm also on Facebook. And the more that I'm able to speak, the more that I'm able to talk about it, the more grateful I am.

mikey doucet (56:23.63)
They can find me on Instagram. It's easy, it's Mikey Duesett, M-I-K-U-Y, D-O-U-C-E-T. I'm also on YouTube, same thing, Mikey Duesett, and I'm also on Facebook. And the more that I'm able to speak, the more that I'm able to talk about it, the more grateful I am. Thank you guys for allowing me this opportunity. Thank you for taking a chance on me. Jim, I appreciate you reaching out. Mike.

Jim (56:45.636)
thank you guys for allowing me this opportunity thank you for taking a chance on me jim i appreciate you reaching out do you remember when i was powerlifting bro thank you for the inspiration man so thank you guys for everything they've adopted t and i think you're listening really appreciate it they've taken the time you'd do the uh... through up the uh... pioneer belt no more powerlifting for you no more powerlifting as we speak

mikey doucet (56:52.054)
Dude, I remember when I was powerlifting, bro. Thank you for the inspiration, man. So thank you guys for everything. Thank you for the opportunity. And thank you for listening. I really appreciate it.

You're very welcome.

mikey doucet (57:11.183)
No more powerlifting as we speak. I did some RFT, raw functional training, for a little while. Really appreciated that. I'm really into endurance training right now. I love cardio. I want to challenge myself to do a marathon. I've done a half marathon. So I still like to lift heavy. I didn't know everything about everything when I started powerlifting, so I was very grateful for it.

Jim (57:15.696)
I did some RFT, raw functional training, for a little while, really appreciated that. I'm really into endurance training right now, like I love cardio. I wanna challenge myself to do a marathon, done a half marathon. So I still like to lift heavy. I didn't know everything about everything when I started power lifting, so I was very grateful for it. They gave me the base that I have today and the strength and encouragement, so.

mikey doucet (57:38.11)
It gave me the base that I have today and the strength and encouragement. So, uh, but yeah, the pioneer belt, it's sitting to the side. Yeah. That's right. Or barefoot. Yeah. Dude, I tried it. My calves got tore up, man. I do have the Bruins. I love them. The, uh, from, um,

Jim (57:44.288)
But yeah, the pioneer belt, it's sitting to the side. Yeah. Whip on the Hoka shoes. Yeah. Everybody's running these days. That's right. Or barefoot. Oh, are you a barefoot runner? Dude, I tried it. My calves. Yeah, I'm out. Yeah, tore up, man. I do have the Bruins. I love them. I don't know if I could do all that. From, um. Barefoot? Yes. Yeah. Chris Duffin's company, yeah. Yes, Chris Duffin.

mikey doucet (58:08.618)
Yes, from Barefoot. Yep. Yes, Christoph and former foster youth.

Jim (58:13.344)
former foster youth. He will love hearing that. Yeah. We've talked to Duffin about his journey a little bit. Yeah. I consider him as good a friend in the fitness industry as one can have, I think. That's right. Yeah. He's a NorCal boy. Yeah. Ladies and gentlemen, brand new episode every Wednesday and Friday. Thank you for digging in and listening to us.

mikey doucet (58:25.87)
That's right.

Jim (58:38.044)
3sb.co for all your clothing needs, goodcompanydiscord.com if you want to tap into the community and Sal and Mike, where you want to find me? I'm Matthew J. McD on all the social media. This show is 50% Facts, where percent is a word and 50 is just numbers. 50% Facts is a Spreaker Prime podcast in association with iHeart Media on the Obscure Celebrity Network. And we'll talk to you next time. All right, don't go anywhere yet. We need a little save action. What do you...